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Welcome to GUY CODE, the official blog of MTV2's "Guy Code" series and your online destination for all things dude, including—but not limited to—irreverent commentary on sports, hip-hop and ladies. Stay awhile and flex your manhood.

"Real World: St. Thomas" premieres this Wednesday at 10/9c, and we can't wait to see the new crop of wild kids that will embarrass themselves on TV every week for our summer entertainment. There are a few certain things you can expect from every season of "Real World," like someone cheating on their boyfriend/girlfriend, someone getting sent to the hospital and someone being kicked out of the house, or at least threatened to be kicked out. And, of course, each house always has (at least) one resident crazy chick. These are the girls who, though usually the hottest ones, are also the most likely to experience "Jennifer's Body"-level rage blackouts. After a careful selection process, we give you eight of our favorite wild ladies from the past 10 years of "Real World."
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Credit: Eri Morita

It's summer, and that means trips to various bodies of water of both the salt and fresh persuasion, and that means chicks in bikinis. And do you know what chicks in bikinis LOVE? Dudes who can rip some gnar moves in the water. If you can do that, the water isn't the only thing you'll make splash.

Women love the mystique of a man in a half-open wetsuit, confidently striding off the pier and ready to grip it and rip it. It's science. So which water sport should you pursue in your pursuit of the ladies? Surfing is super hard, and not everyone lives near surfable waves. Cliff diving is terrifying, plus the proximity issue again. Water-skiing jumped the shark when the Fonz jumped the shark. Windsurfing isn't that cool because even creaky old politicians can do it. Plus, there's barely any flipping. Do you know what has tons of flipping? WAKEBOARDING.

"If he can flip so gracefully like that on the water, there's no telling what he can do in the bedroom!" say all the women, probably. So you better brush up on your wakeboarding skills if you hope to bag a beach betty this summer. And we know exactly where to start: MTV's new show "Wake Brothers." The show follows Bob and Phillip Soven, brothers who are the #4 and #1 ranked wakeboarders, respectively. Based on the following trailer, the show promises plenty of wakeboarding action and the sexy action wakeboarders get as a result. So study this trailer like game film, my friends.

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Credit: 20th Century Fox

In case you've been living in the 19th century, there's a movie coming out tomorrow called "Abraham Lincoln: Vampire Hunter." Yes, that's the name of a real film (which is actually based on a book of the same name) about Lincoln's mission to destroy the vampires that are taking over the United States. Is it strange to use Abe Lincoln as the protagonist of such a bizarre concept? Yes. But is it unprecedented? Definitely not. There have been a ton of super strange pop culture depictions of Lincoln in the past. We've listed 10 of our favorites below.
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A couple days ago, people watching the local Texas Rangers broadcast were treated to an odd moment when announcer Dave Barnett began speaking gibberish about a player being on "fifth base" and a "botched robbery." At first people wondered if he was having an on-air stroke or aneurysm or something, but it turns out he was just suffering from a serious migraine. So now we can listen to it and laugh hysterically. Ah, mild brain failure!

Click here to watch

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This week, we put together a Father's Day Gift Guide full of sweet loot that you'd want to give your pops for being such a kick-ass molder of men. Stuff you'd want to borrow from your pops. This is not that guide. This guide is for the a**holes out there who want to f*** with their dads a little. You know, the guys who want their Father's Day gift to be kind of awesome and kind of weird at the same time. The type of gift where your dad doesn't quite know what you're trying to say.  Then we have the perfect gifts: infomercial products.

Infomercial products are great because they're affordable, and they're usually for some embarrassing hygiene problem or helping to feed into the buyer's family identity as the "lazy" brother. So below, we have eight "As Seen On TV" gifts that will let your dad know that you're thinking of him...but also leave him wondering why...

For The Dad Who's Irregular

Dual Action Cleanse
This dubious colon cleanse formula promises he'll have triumphantly thick, ropy bowel movements the size of a forearm. Weird, although your dad does like sitting on his throne.

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The third season of "Workaholics" is in full swing and their cult of viewers couldn't be happier. Comedy Central's offbeat sitcom about the office antics of three all-play-no-work dudes has become a pipe dream for American slackers across the country. Why can't partying instead of working be our main priority? Why can't we have co-workers who will eat ceiling tile with us? Would we get fired if we showed up to work wearing a bear costume?

Hell, that's why it's become one of our favorite shows. And the reason we're so excited for this exclusive bloopers clip from the new "Workaholics'" DVD and Blu Ray releases. If you're like us, you'll want to pick up the "Workaholics" Season Two DVD or the  Seasons One & Two Combo Daddy Blu Ray release to revisit all your favorite stupid/hilarious moments. Or this is a great opportunity to catch up on the show that should already be on your "must-watch" schedule, but you've been slacking. It's OK, you can slack on watching slackers and be forgiven...but not forever. Watch the exclusive blooper featurette below and get on track.

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Since season two ended on Sunday night, we've been going through some severe "Game Of Thrones" withdrawal. How are we supposed to get our weekly fix of bloodshed and sexposition and dragons? We've tried bandying about phrases like "the realm" and "the iron price" and "power is power," but they just aren't catching on in the daily lexicon. We can't afford the $30,000 iron throne replica.

Luckily, Buzzfeed pointed us to this wonderful, nerdy, badass "Game Of Thrones" rap that samples the song from the HBO show's opening credits. Just how dorky is this? Rapper Dominik Omega starts off by calling out the fairweather TV fans (i.e. us) who only watch the show and haven't read the colossal books. Also, the song is actually good! So who the hell is Dominik Omega? We have no idea, but we'd now like to see him sack Kings Landing and valiantly lead the Seven Kingdoms.

Check it out below, and we defy you not to hit "replay" as soon as it's over.

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Today's Badass did much of his finest work in the late 1970s and early 1980s as the original host of "Family Feud," at a time when it was feasible for a kiss-happy British-born actor to spread his warmth over America. Dawson passed away over the weekend at age 79. Executive producer Howard Felsher estimated that over the course of Dawson's 10-year run as host of the game show, the "Kissing Bandit" laid a wet one on about 20,000 women. Some of them more than once. He's basically the Wilt Chamberlain of kissing.

Times have changed and America is a bit more prude and politically correct, at least on national television. "I kissed them for luck and love, that's all," Dawson said. To his credit, most women seemed willing participants in the smooches he planted on them as fathers, brothers and uncles (and possibly even husbands) looked on. It's not like the ladies didn't expect a kiss. Dawson eventually even met his future wife on the show when she was a contestant in 1981, Gretchen Johnson. Click on to see a few more of Dawson's greatest kisses.

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Credit: Tom Dulat/Getty Images

The 2012 MTV Movie Awards are Sunday, June 3 at 9/8c, hosted by unpredictable scamp Russell Brand. The spectacle will feature performances by The Black Keys, Fun. and Wiz Khalifa. We're not sure what any of them have to do with movies, but who gives a s***. This is the 'Nam of movie awards shows, NO RULES!

Since MTV's award shows are known to feature fart jokes and ass-to-face pranks, what butt-related hijinks are in store this year? We're here to play oddsmakers to find out, just in case Las Vegas wants to open lines on this year's MTV Movie Awards. Below we've handicapped the biggest categories and events for Sunday's show. Not that we're promoting gambling or anything...

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Credit: Eat Cake and Be Merry

Let's get this out of the way first: Cakes should always be about tasting good, not looking good. We'll always prefer a cake that resembles a pile of human excrement and tastes like heaven to some fancy pants cake plastered in fondant.

That said, a cake that both looks AND tastes good is ideal. And we're guessing this three-layer beast with Ron Swanson's face on it fits that criteria. Created by cake blogger Liz Shim for her husband, this cake looks killer, tastes killerer (we're taking her word for it) and is dedicated to one of the best shows on TV. So in the spirit of the Internet, which mandates blogs to round-up photos of similar things, we present 16 more cakes dedicated to fantastic TV shows.

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