Welcome to GUY CODE, the official blog of MTV2's "Guy Code" series and your online destination for all things dude, including—but not limited to—irreverent commentary on sports, hip-hop and ladies. Stay awhile and flex your manhood.
Angus T. Jones, the kid from "Two And A Half Men," isn't returning for the 11th season because of religious reasons...and a rant in which he encouraged people not to watch the "filth on CBS." The show must go on, though, so let's help CBS cast a replacement.
Looking to replace a wisecracking young man who used to be an adorable child star? Macaulay Culkin's phone should be ringing off the hook! Plus, Culkin and Kutcher with a guest cameo from Mila Kunis would be a ratings bonanza.
3. Jason Alexander
Yeah, he's a little old for the part, but George Costanza was America's original "half man" to Jerry and Kramer. Jason Alexander is the premiere short stature, short-fused sidekick...and if there's one thing he knows, it's how to get laughs from living with his parents.
Duane "Dog" Chapman has led a hardcore life. He's been in and out of jail--including a Mexican prison, which (in case you hadn't heard) isn't too cushy--and as a bail enforcement agent, he's brought countless fugitives to justice. His new series, "Dog And Beth: On The Hunt," premieres Saturday at 5 p.m. ET/PT on CMT.
Recently, MTV News asked Dog for his version of Guy Code, which comes down to this: "Everybody has broken the law," but "there are people who deserve to be in hell." Watch the rest of his badass answer below:
Even if you don't watch "Mad Men," which just came back for its sixth season, you have to admire the miracle of physics that is Christina Hendricks. Her body never ceases to amaze, yet you get the feeling that she could (literally and figuratively) tear out your heart...which somehow makes her even hotter, as you can see from Unreality's gallery of her 15 finest photos. Like this one from the, uh, Golden Globes:
Credit: Getty Images
(We don't know what's keeping that dress up, but it's clearly one of the strongest fabrics known to man...and possibly proof that God is a man.)
It's hard not to love "Game of Thrones," what with all the intrigue, sex, war, Natalie Dormer, beheading, betrayal and did we mention Natalie Dormer? But there's another reason to watch: You can actually learn some vital Guy Code lessons.
1. Loyalty To Your Bros
As a member of the Night's Watch, Jon Snow (everyone's favorite illegitimate son) has sworn off girls, so all he's got left are his buddies. Whether he's backing up Sam Tarly or saving the Lord Commander from the undead, Lord Snow's the kind of friend you want in a bar fight.
2. Don't Be "That Guy"
On the other end of the spectrum, we've got two of the worst Code Breakers on TV: Jaime Lannister and Joffrey Baratheon. On top of generally acting like a douche, Jaime's sleeping with his sister, the queen, a.k.a. the boss' wife. It's not a pretty combo.
Like father like son, all Joffrey does is talk about how awesome he is and threaten to put people's heads on spikes. His uncle even tries to get him laid, in a threesome no less, and what does he do? He has one girl beat the other to death. On top of it all, he treats his girl's family like crap. Major no-no.
A lot has changed since the very first MTV Movie Awards all the way back in 1992. For starters, viewers were unable to vote for the winners via the Internet. We don't wanna lecture you on how life was back in the days of Heather B. and "Liquid Television," though. What we'd like to do is celebrate the 22nd Movie Awards with a trip down memory lane. Turn off the Super Nintendo, put aside your Jordan Dream Team jersey, and catch up on the winners/nominees/performers from the '92 Movie Awards.
When he decided to hang up his action-flick boots, he was elected governor of California. Among many other bills passed, his most popular one was the legalization of (cough, cough) medical marijuana. Nowadays, Schwarzenegger is returning to films, but not without a little scandal in the form of knocking up his maid. That's a judgment day we'd want no part of. Read More...
We've all found ourselves making the Friend Zone Face when a girl shoots us down with some variation of "I love you...but not like that." For most of us, it's a bump in an otherwise smooth road--but what if your entire life was being trapped the Friend Zone?
That's the hellish question raised by "Ladies Man: A MADE Movie" (based on the MTV series "MADE"). It's the story of Toby, a guy whose shoulder girls cry on...to complain about guys whom they actually have sex with. We brought you the trailer yesterday, and here's another taste of what to expect when the movie airs tonight at 9/8c on MTV.
The MTV series "MADE" is all about people transforming their lives. Nothing can transform your life more than learning Guy Code, of course, which is what makes us excited to watch "Ladies Man: A MADE Movie."
It's the story of a loser trapped in the Friend Zone, who becomes determined--upon arriving at college--to win the Mr. Olympus Pageant, his golden ticket to convincing ladies that he's a stud. The competition is fierce (specifically, the dick frat boy wearing a necklace above), and our hero doesn't have much time to amp up his physical fitness, knowledge of women, social skills and every other quality a guy needs to get laid.
Check out the trailer, and then watch the movie Tuesday at 9/8c on MTV.
On the sixth season premiere of "Mad Men," Don Draper didn't commit a mere misdemeanor against Guy Code; he became a first-degree felon. We've always respected Draper--he lives by his own rules, makes a fortune, and knows how to rock a suit and order a manly cocktail--but we just can't condone his actions last night.
Consider this your spoiler alert, and read on for more about this shocking, unforgivable Code Breaker. (Well, maybe not that shocking. This is Don Draper we're talkin' about.)
If you're lucky enough to live in Southern California, then check out the L.A. Comedy Shorts Festival next weekend. It's the biggest comedy film fest in the U.S., and Will Ferrell's Funny Or Die is a major sponsor. You know, Will Ferrell, the guy who'll be honored at the 2013 MTV Movie Awards with the Comedic Genius Award?
At the L.A. Comedy Shorts Festival (get tickets here), Key and Peele will be likewise honored with the Commie Award. To celebrate, we've put together some of their greatest sketches...