Welcome to GUY CODE, the official blog of MTV2's "Guy Code" series and your online destination for all things dude, including—but not limited to—irreverent commentary on sports, hip-hop and ladies. Stay awhile and flex your manhood.
Thirty-one-year-old Zac Vawter is a few different things: a software programer, a motorcycle aficionado and... a cyborg.
The guy lost his right leg in a 2009 motorcycle crash. No biggie. He just talked the Department of Defense into making him a test subject for an $8 million thought-controlled prosthetic limb. And now he's going to climb the 103-story Willis Tower in Chicago as part of a fundraiser to help the Center for Bionic Medicine, which sounds like something out of an Isaac Asimov novel.
"Vawter will think, 'Climb stairs,' and the motors, belts and chains in his leg will synchronize the movements of its ankle and knee," according to the Associated Press, as "11 electrodes placed on the skin of Vawter’s thigh [feed] data to the bionic leg's microcomputer."
You can watch the half-man/half-machine in action below, or you can just wait until he single-handedly, single-leggedly conquers the primitive, obsolete human race.
Sergeant Andrea Dobyns told Albuquerque ABC affiliate KOAT-TV, "Our officers got a call from a homeless male who said he's just been beat up by Gene Hackman. This male got up in his face, assaulted him." Police determined Hackman was acting in self-defense and thus will not be charged. Becker has a long rap sheet and is now not only an "Enemy of the State" but an enemy of Gene Hackman. Mr. Becker, you are ... "Unforgiven."
If you've ever visited Arlington Cemetery near Washington, D.C., you can attest that the Tomb of the Unknowns--where unidentified soldiers from World War I, World War II, Korea and Vietnam are buried--is one of the most powerful monuments. The 3rd U.S. Infantry Regiment, in charge of continuously guarding the tomb, takes its duty seriously... so seriously, in fact, that Hurricane Sandy is no excuse to take a day off. They haven't walked away since 1937, and a little rain--you know, a foot of it--won't stop them now.
We here at Guy Code, telecommuting like pansies today, salute these brave Americans. You can view more photographs on the Old Guard's Facebook page.
At age 12, Michigan girl Kathryn DiMaria sat down her parents to tell them ... she wanted to buy a Pontiac Fiero with her babysitting money, to rebuild so she could drive it when she turned 16. "Lots of miles, but solid chassis and a few spare parts," her father initially posted to a Fiero forum, part of a greater Fiero community that's taken her under its wing, contributing some cash, spare parts and knowledge.
So it turns out Megan Fox's character from "Transformers" -- a little girl who grew up as daddy's little grease monkey -- is not at all a mythological figure like a unicorn (sorry Bronies). Not that some ladies don't dig cars, but you don't meet Kathryn DiMarias every day. Now 14, she wants to become an engineer when she's older, although she's not done restoring the 1986 Fiero she bought for $450 two years ago. (By the way, the Fiero went out of production in 1989.) Right now, she's rebuilding a 3.4-liter Camaro engine to replace the 2.8-liter the Fiero came with, according to CNN. After that, the water pump, then maybe some history homework and babysitting.
After getting ditched on the side of the "Devil's Highway" without his wheelchair, a New Mexico man dragged himself four miles over desert rocks and dirt for three days and two nights until a motorist rescued him. Forty-nine-year-old Ricky Gilmore had been hitchhiking with a heartless couple that left him for dead after he declined to share alcohol with them (Guy Code: Share booze when riding with strangers?).
"I was just trying to plead with him not to pull me out but he had those wild, devilish eyes," Gilmore said. "I did not want to fight back...if I did fight back all hell would come loose...I know gangsters like that, they just that start clubbing away."
He suffered a torturous "127 Hours"-level ordeal that left his jeans tattered, the skin on his left leg and butt mutilated, kidneys failing due to food and water deprivation and heart wrenched that people could be so callous. His body temperature also dropped five degrees from having to brave near-freezing temperatures overnight.
"Ah man, I'm just a big mess," he said, now recovering in a hospital. "I ache and I'm just in the first stages of healing." Gilmore said he's going to stop hitchhiking for a while, maybe at least on Devil's Highway, which apparently is accurately labeled.
We know this because Jason Sudeikis' girlfriend Olivia Wilde said so at a party the other day. "We have sex like Kenyan marathon runners," she told Vulture. Which is to say, their sex is smooth, effective, long-lasting and Olympic-caliber. Nice. Just look at the grin on Sudeikis' face. You're damn right. That Wilde is out and about gushing about their bedroom says that she's quite satisfied and proud. So he's not just the guy with a sense of humor that every woman claims to want, but a gifted sex machine too. Good for him.
Wilde had quite a bit more to say about sex and she didn't hold back. For example, she said about a sign it's time to leave a relationship:
"Sometimes your vagina dies. Then you know it's time to go. There's no reason to sacrifice your womanhood and femininity for some sort of weird feeling of responsibility to something that may not be right. I feel like far too many women do that."
She also dropped some possible Girl Code:
"[Men] are not allowed to be the only ones thinking with their genitals. We think with our pu****s."
Fair or foul? Discussion for another post. For now, let's salute Sudeikis's stamina.
"Fearless" Felix Baumgartner is scheduled to break the sound barrier today with his body after he jumps from a pressurized capsule inside a giant helium balloon from an altitude of 120,000 feet above Earth. Otherwise known as the edge of space, also known as holy s***! The 43-year-old Austrian daredevil/military parachutist has been working with the Red Bull Stratos team for several years to perfect the science behind the mission, and if conditions permit, will make the jump at about 1:30 p.m. Tuesday. (Red Bull is airing the jump live here.)
A member of the Stratos team is retired Air Force colonel Joe Kittinger, who in 1960 set the height and speed free fall records with a jump from 102,800 feet (19.5 miles), when he reached 614 mph, just shy of Mach 1. If all goes well today, Baumgartner expects to reach 690 mph, or Mach 1, shortly into his free fall.
"When you close your visor, it's your own little world. You don't hear anything from the outside anymore," Baumgartner said. "The only thing that you hear is yourself breathing all the time. Then you start thinking about bad things and it's getting worse in a very short amount of time. Your brain sometimes does fancy things."
Weather and wind has delayed the start of the jump a bit. We'll update with video once it's available. Meantime, there's a short video on the next page with more information about the mission after the jump. Bam!! Pun intended.
Update: Red Bull aborted the mission "due to wind gusts making an attempt too risky." Maybe tomorrow or later this month.
English rugby player Paul Wood is now operating with one less nut after rupturing a testicle in a match this past weekend that doctors removed later during an emergency surgery. The exact time of the testicle's death was roughly two minutes into the second half when Wood took a knee to the groin, yet he played the entirety of the contest despite the damage. Wood's Warrington Wolves lost the match (and he his testicle) but Wood took it all like a champ, writing on Twitter, "Tony Smith (coach) did say in his pre-match team talk last night 'your balls are on the line here guys!' I didn't think he meant literally." Post surgery, Wood quipped, "Just coming out the hospital to go home... Seriously feel like I've left something?" And then our favorite, he threw his wife under the bus for not nurturing him back to good health. Wood wrote, "@Shelley_Wood won't rub them better either."
No, the inmate is not the badass -- he's Today's Dumbass in this two-for-one post. The badass nod goes to South Carolina public defender Daniel Hall, who got clubbed in the face by the man he was representing that pleaded guilty to robbery and assault charges. The inmate, Lamarcus Williamson, was wearing an orange jumpsuit and handcuffs during the sentencing hearing, and didn't take kindly to the 15-year prison sentence handed down by the judge; maybe Williamson expected a less severe stint.
Anyhow, video in the courtroom shows Williamson stare at Hall and then take a full backswing with both arms (they were bound together!) then pop a completely unsuspecting Hall in the face with the cuff-club, causing Hall's head and neck to snap back as he loses his balance and falls to the ground. Williamson gets pulled away by courtroom officers while Hall, an older gentleman, bounces right back up as if he's part of some AARP fight club accustomed to taking clean hits or pot shots from violent criminals. Hall got a bloody mouth, props and good reason to stand back a few feet in the future when his clients hear their sentences. Williamson got an extra six months on his sentence for criminal content. Check it out.
Remember WWE wrestler Daivari? He was the heel who Vince McMahon cast after the September 11th attacks to symbolize American suspicions against the Arab world. In classic WWE fashion, Daivari teamed up with Muhammed Hassan as a pair of Arab-Americans who were fed up with all the profiling against Arabs. It was a very touchy subject to deal with at the time, but Vince found a way. Daivari's storyline even managed to resurrect Hulk Hogan and that theme song we've all come to know and love.
Well, in every sense of the definition of irony Daivari was nowhere near the angry Arab-American he portrayed. According to TMZ, Daivari thwarted some maniac in Minneapolis who threatened to kill an entire train of passengers. As a flurry of racial slurs were screamed out, an emergency button was pushed to alert authorities. However, Daivari was tired of waiting around and sprung into Badass Mode. He crept up on the jerk, slapped a choke hold on him, and threw him off the train at the next stop. He may not have been a fan favorite while wrestling with the WWE, but he is certainly a force to be reckoned with on the Minneapolis Metro Transit Rail.
Nowadays, you can catch Daivari wrestling for TNA under the name Sheik Abdul Bashir. He remains a heel, but something tells us that may change in the near future. As for the jackass who threatened an entire train, witnesses claimed that Daivari had clamped down so hard on him that he wet his pants. No word on whether Daivari's theme played as he exited the train.