Normally the words "Porsche," "driver" and "badass" wouldn't been seen together in the same sentence, but this racer smashed that hard and fast gearhead rule during a recent race in Baltimore. Racer Jeroen Bleekemolen took a wrong turn on the track during a qualifying race for the GT3 Baltimore Grand Prix and lost his left front tire, leaving him with a very thin grasp for the lead.
The rules state cars can only use one set of tires during the race. So instead of punching the steering wheel and crawling into the fetal position on the front seat in a puddle of tears, Bleekemolen parks on the track, runs after the lost tire, throws it on the front seat and races over to the pit lane. His crew throws the tire back on and he goes on to reach the checkered flag in time.
Look NBA players, we know Justin Bieber is very hot right now and you're very bored right now. We know your daughter or wife or, God forbid, your son, would think you're way cool if they saw you playing a pickup game with him. But it's a bad idea and you SHOULD NOT DO IT. Playing basketball with Bieber is the ultimate no-win situation. Either you look like a di** for dominating the little guy or you look like a sad old man for getting beat by him. It's like Cleveland: There's just no winning.
Steve Nash knows all about this. The NBA legend and arguably the greatest point guard in the history of the game (of course, you'd have to forget about Magic Johnson to make that argument) recently found himself on the court with his fellow Canuck and the result was bad. Well, nine seconds of it was bad. And naturally, those are the nine seconds that have made it to YouTube. What they show should serve as a warning to anyone thinking of lacing them up with the shrimpy Canuck (Bieber, not Nash). Watch it and realize what this means: If Justin Bieber can cross up Steve Nash, he can dunk on you.
Jersey Shore locals seem to use the same "punch first, ask questions later" policy that "Jersey Shore" cast members do. This slightly terrifying, protective(?) father is spooked by a man in a snowman costume, pretending to be a snowman statue. Naturally, he punches the snowman in the head. It's an understandable knee-jerk reaction to someone scaring the crap out of you and your kid, but an innocent toddler is caught in the crossfire when the snowman tumbles on her. As for the fate of the Scary Snowman, and the man within the snowman, we assume everything turned out OK because there are quite a few more videos of him scaring the crap out of people.
It's not every day we're willing to bestow the honor of "Today's Badass" on a kid with no pubes and a girl's name. But it is today! Meet skateboarding prodigy Rene Serrano, a little twig of a kid who's the best young skater we've ever seen. He's got tons of tricks in his repertoire and the uncanny ability to LAND THEM ALL. Kid's balance is like Philippe Petit's! Right, guys? Crazy thing is, he's so young that he's only going to get better. Impossible you say? Wrong. Nothing is impossible for Rene. Except for having a dude's name (sorry, one too many times with that joke?).
If All-Star exhibition games are the only NBA-caliber action we get for the next several months, at least they're highlight reels. In an exhibition last night before a near-capacity crowd at Morgan State University in Baltimore, Kevin Durant's Washington D.C.-based Goodman League squad faced Carmelo Anthony's Baltimore-based Melo League team, led by Anthony, LeBron James and Chris Paul. Durant emerged as the star of the game, scoring 59 points, although KD's squad fell 149-141 to Melo and Co.'s.
This game, along with every other stop on Durant's tour-de-you-got-wrecked, has been the only positive news during the contentious NBA lockout. Representatives for the players and owners are meeting today, though, for the first time in a long time.
Hating on LeBron James is a sport too, so we'll point out that Durant and All Defensive Team member @KingJames "went at each other" for most of the game. LeBron, who is getting coached up on his low post game by Hakeem Olajuwon, scored 32. That's weak in comparison. Check out the highlights.
Photo: Getty Images
Laboring throughout, Sogelau Tuvalu ran the second slowest 100 meter time in the history of the IAAF World Championships this past weekend. And he couldn't be prouder. Because the 17-year-old shot-putter of American Samoa wasn't even supposed to be competing in the event, but having failed to qualify in the shot put, he said, "Hey, f*** it! I'm already here." And he signed up for the 100m race. Now that is the mark of a true badass. Not giving a single f***.
The announcers laughed heartily at Tuvalu's expense, perhaps misguided about his goals, but also understandably because the scene was quite a spectacle. Prior to the race, betting websites listed Tuvalu's odds of winning at 50,000 to 1. In other words, the line-setters sooner thought that the remainder of the seven-man field would either collapse during the race, get attacked by a band of unruly birds, stop mid-race to take a huge dump or otherwise fail to complete the 100 meters in less than 15.66 seconds--Tuvalu's time. That time, by the way, was the young man's personal best. “I believed in myself,” he said of the effort. “This is a dream come true.” You've got to see it.
Hurricane Irene wreaked havoc on most of the Eastern Seaboard and forced the evacuation of thousands New York City residents. However, the threat did not stop a group of part brave, part insane dudes from playing rugby in an otherwise empty Times Square.
The men competed in the "Hurricane Cup," as the cameraman calls it, at around 9 p.m. on Saturday as rain poured down on New York's abandoned streets. What would possess a group of guys to strap on their uniforms and tackle one another on cement with 80 mile-per-hour winds closing in? Well, because it's kind of awesome and makes for great amateur footage. That's part of it. The other part is a desire to say "Eff you, Mother Nature! You may bring your high winds and flooding, but you will never take our freedom!!!!" Watch the video with some (entertaining) NSFW language from the cameraman.
Emma Stone went from "that chick in 'Superbad'" to "drooled-over babe" in about 10 seconds. Jim Carrey went from "comedy king" to "family-film afterthought" in about the same span. There's no reason the two should be linked. Until today's bit of badassery from Carrey!
Carrey released a candid video on his website in which he somewhat jokingly, somewhat creepily professes his love for the young starlet. The words seem pretty tongue-in-cheek, but the "Blair Witch-style" camerawork adds an enigmatic touch that makes it unclear if Carrey is dead serious. Joke or not, he lays it all out there, and that's kind of badass.
Let's face it, dude needs no help with the ladies. He bedded Lauren Holly and Jenny McCarthy, two pantheon '90s babes. But he knows that was a different time. He knows the charm of the young, rubber-faced wild man he once was has worn off. And knows the pelvic thrusts have become creaky penguin dances. And yet, he's going for it. Instead of trying to be a man from a bygone era, he goes for the dirty truth. The gray hairs. The trouble peeing. And that quivering lip at the end! Look, pity sex can be a great thing, and Carrey knows that.
Perhaps the most badass thing of all--Jim proves he's a regular guy. We've all looked at Emma Stone and thought about the crazy things we'd do for her. Carrey has obviously thought about that, and whether serious or not, he's gone out and done one of those crazy things. Now the name "Jim Carrey" is in the same sentence as "Emma Stone." And that is much more badass than anything we've accomplished today.
Kate Winslet--actress, wife, total badass. The 35-year-old British actress was relaxing at Virgin honcho and hot air balloon enthusiast Richard Branson's island house yesterday when lightning struck the place and set it ablaze. Branson's 90-year-old mother, Eve, and other family were staying there too when the flames rose, setting Kate into action. "She [Winslet] was staying there with her children and in fact it was she who carried my mother out of the house," Branson said.
In other words: HOLY S***! Granted, the average 90-year-old woman probably doesn't weigh more than about 80 or 90 pounds, but we remain thoroughly impressed (honest) with Kate's grace under fire (pun!). More so if Kate picked her up and threw her over her shoulder, fireman-carry-style. Because that would look cool. Branson added about Kate's reaction, "[She said] 'it's like being in a film set where you're waiting for the words 'cut,' but they just don't come." Truly brave. Your move, rest of Hollywood.
Photo: Getty Images
Alex Trebek just took "Badass" for $1,000 and nailed it. Sort of.
Yesterday, the immortal "Jeopardy" host decided to take matters into his own hands when the San Francisco hotel room he and his wife were staying in was robbed by a 56-year-old woman with a long rap sheet. After the suspect, identified as Lucinda Moyers, broke into Trebek's room at 2:30 in the morning, the 72-year-old master of trivia began chasing Moyers down the hotel hallway until his heel gave out and his Achilles tendon tore.
"The snap and the sound," Trebek said, describing the injury. "I played sports all my life."
We'll give him a pass for failing to nab the perp himself. Police eventually found and arrested her and, of course, she's denying that she jacked Trebek's cash and a bracelet he wore that his mother gave him. It would have been a better story if Trebek got her in a headlock and gave her the People's Elbow, but at least Moyers will have to answer to formal charges. And, after all, the PEN is mightier.
Photo: Getty Images