Sometimes it can be tough for guys to know if they're coming off as creepy or charming. He might have the best of intentions, but the girl just reads the situation as, "DANGER! DANGER!" For example, a guy might watch the movie "Love & Sex" and decide to hire a little person with bongos to serenade his attractive coworker. If the coworker doesn't know where the gesture is coming from, she'll get creeped out and the office will become a very awkward place.
As a way to help out our male readers, we decided to have Jamie Lee from "Girl Code" play a little game called "Creepy Or Charming." We present her with a variety of situations and she tells if it seems like the guy is being cool or a clown.
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Ryan McKee (@TheRyanMcKee) is the editor of Guy Code Blog
Concept by: RG Daniels (@RGDaniels) is a comedian and writer in Brooklyn, NY.
Credit: Jackie Besteman
You and your girlfriend are enjoying a beautiful spring day when it happens: You encounter your ex. It's possible that you two had a mutual, friendly breakup and she's happy you've found someone new--but yeah, right, like that ever happens. Best to know the possible routes you can take to immediately diffuse a potentially sticky situation.
1. Play it cool
Whether you live in a massive urban enclave or a one-horse town, the chances of eventually running into an ex are likely. Might as well grit your teeth and feign normality. "How'ya doin', girl-I-vomit-at-the-sight-of?" "Not bad, weirdo-I'd-rather-forget." How adult!
2. The cold shoulder
Sometimes a pleasant, amicable conversation is impossible. True martial artists avoid confrontation and only fight out of self-defense, so follow their example and don't escalate the situation into an all-out brawl unless it's absolutely necessary. Walk away and your ex won't have any sort of opening to start something.
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For every girl who thinks her birthday is the most important day of the year, there's a boyfriend who thinks a lame card and a breakfast burrito make a killer gift. Birthdays might not matter to you, but if you mess up hers, you'll hear about it for the next 364 days. Here are a few tips for successfully planning some birthday magic for your lady.
1. The Morning Surprise
This doesn't have to be extravagant like a Lexus with a huge red bow on it--just do something to kick off the day. Breakfast in bed is a classic. Or sneak a "happy birthday" note into her bag. Or, if you're feeling inspired, give her a mini-gift (a dog collar) that hints at the real gift you're giving later (a leather bodysuit...or, uh, a puppy).
2. She's Already Told You What She Wants
Even if she didn't say outright, "Buy this present for my birthday," she's probably dropped hints--you just weren't paying attention. Has she mentioned wanting something recently? Has she mentioned wanting it a thousand times?
Also, remember: The money you spend isn't half as important as the thought you put into it. And don't just get her whatever your buddy got his girl; not all girls are into stuff made out of hemp.
Your friends might have decent advice on getting chicks, but you know who has better advice? Chicks. And last night's premiere episode of "Girl Code" gave you plenty of insider knowledge to work with...
1. Give Her Your Breast Regards
Girls are all insecure about their boob size, so a compliment in the bedroom can go a long way--but keep it tasteful. Do NOT say, "I wanna touch your boobies," Carly Aquilino warns.
2. Fit The Profile Or Move On
Most girls have a "type," so 90% of impressing them is just fitting it. For Jessimae Peluso, it's guys with "forearm tattoos and priors." For April Rose, who has a "major daddy complex," it's older guys. Some ladies even love fat dudes. The point is, if she's feeling you, you'll know right away. Otherwise, you're wasting your time.
3. Study Her Body...Language
She won't outright tell you that she's feeling you, though--instead, she'll touch your arm and laugh harder than normal. (This can be confusing, as Chris Distefano notes, because she might just be on Quaaludes.)
Tonight on the series premiere of "Girl Code" (10:30/9:30c on MTV), the cast discusses the problems and benefits of roommates. Men only ask themselves three questions when picking a roommate: 1) Will he pay rent? 2) Will he mess with my stuff? and 3) Will he creep out girls I bring home? If the answers are "yes," "no" and "no" (or "yes, but in a funny way"), you've scored a solid bunkmate.
However, when faced with a potential female roommate, guys will overthink it. Maybe we feel like we're being tricked into a committed relationship, or we're worried she'll be a cock-blocker or that we can't just let loose and "be a dude" in our own home. These are all valid concerns, but the potential benefits of a female roommate outweigh the risks.
1. You'll meet more girls
Unless she's one of those girls who "only hangs with guys" because she "hates other girls," chances are a female roommate will have mostly female friends. This is a way for you to meet women while doing nothing. They'll just show up to your place, and they have to be polite to you since you're the roommate.
This can backfire, though, because if you hit it off with one of her friends, your roommate may cock-block you by saying, "You can't sleep with him. I have to live with him and things will get awkward." Still, the more girls you meet, the better your chances.
Credit: Sam Diephuis
You've fought over whether to change your relationship status. You've argued about including her in your profile picture. And now, your girlfriend might want you to split a Facebook account with her. No matter how common this gets, it's breaking Guy Code.
Because whether you're sharing drunken photos or strange political beliefs, your Facebook account is for expressing yourself as an individual. That's the whole reason Facebook was created. Being in a couple doesn't mean that you're not your own man--at least, it shouldn't--so why represent yourself that way online?
Credit: Niko Guido
You might think it's unfair that your teacher grades on the curve--those nerds in class are ruining your GPA--but you're actually grading yourself on the curve in the sack. (At least you've got the nerds beat there...right?)
A new study from the University of Colorado Boulder found that getting laid only makes you so happy; for true satisfaction, you have to get laid more often than your friends.
Even if you're bangin' it out a couple times per month, your chances of depression are 14% higher if your pals are bangin' it out weekly. The problem, says the lead researcher, is that most of us compare ourselves against people we envy instead of people who envy us: "We're usually not looking down and therefore thinking of ourselves as better off, but we're usually looking up and therefore feeling insufficient and inadequate."
MORE: "The Best Amount Of Sex Is 'More Than Your Friends Are Having'"
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No matter how great a song is, you can only hear it so many consecutive times before snapping. A single-track playlist on repeat can break prisoners, and can also break relationships.
For example, Macklemore & Ryan Lewis's "Thrift Shop" is a great enough jam to make the 2013 MTV Movie Awards playlist. But when 26-year-old Lars Hansen of Boulder County, Colorado, sang it over and over on his birthday, his girlfriend Samantha Malson (who had asked him to stop "25 times") allegedly choked him to make it cease.
Why didn't Hansen stop singing? According to police, it might've been revenge. The couple had been fighting because "Hansen accused Malson of drinking all the alcohol in the house." In fact, cops say, "his face was flushed and it was difficult to tell if the redness was from alcohol intoxication or from Malson grabbing his neck."
Regardless, she's now facing domestic violence and harassment charges. On the bright side, at least this couple finally has a tune they can consider "their song."
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Neal Stastny (@NealStas) is a comedian and writer in New York.
On the sixth season premiere of "Mad Men," Don Draper didn't commit a mere misdemeanor against Guy Code; he became a first-degree felon. We've always respected Draper--he lives by his own rules, makes a fortune, and knows how to rock a suit and order a manly cocktail--but we just can't condone his actions last night.
Consider this your spoiler alert, and read on for more about this shocking, unforgivable Code Breaker. (Well, maybe not that shocking. This is Don Draper we're talkin' about.)