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Welcome to GUY CODE, the official blog of MTV2's "Guy Code" series and your online destination for all things dude, including—but not limited to—irreverent commentary on sports, hip-hop and ladies. Stay awhile and flex your manhood.

LADIES The Top 10 Hottest Indie Rock Girls At Austin City Limits [Fab Life]
Sexy and ironic!

BANGERS Joe Budden feat. Crooked I "Sober Up" [XXL Mag]
Get a contact high.

BOARDS 5 trick fix: Washington [GrindTV]
Someone call a doctor, these tricks are sick.

DOUBLE DUTCH M.I.A. and Rye Rye's hot new clip "Sunshine" [SPIN]
M.I.A. and her protégé make a real nice pair.

WHEELS How to take care of a sh**ty car [The Smoking Jacket]
Tape-deck nostalgia.

CARLTON DANCE Touchdown celebration of the day [The Daily What]
This is unusual, and it's outstanding.

RAWK Be a Rock God in three simple steps (NSFW) [BuzzFeed]
You probably shouldn't try this at home.

TMI Just because you can share everything on Facebook doesn't mean you should [CollegeHumor]
A Facebook breakup, because text messaging is just too civilized.

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LADIES Casanova likes smiling, surfing the web and long drives at night [Suicide Girls]
Our kind of girl.

RAWK Linkin Park - "Waiting For The End" video premiere [MTV]
The video was shot somewhere between The Matrix and Pandora.

AIR Huge bike jumps into a pond [The High Definite]
Exactly what it says.

SKIN ESPN: The Magazine Body Issue: ranking the nearly nude photos [Bleacher Report]
It's basically National Geographic Athletes Edition.

TRUTH 7 honest restaurant signs [CollegeHumor]
PF Chang's got served.

TRICK OR TREAT The weirdest Halloween costumes for kids [Huffington Post]
Meet baby Nacho Libre!

MEME TRACKER Cigar Guy update--identity still unknown, 'Turban' is really a wig [Urlesque]
Nobody can be this awesome and expect to remain anonymous.

BREASTS The 60 most beautiful breasts in support of breast cancer awareness month [COED]
Donate, enjoy, then spread the word.

Photo: Suicide Girls

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According the Miami Police Department, the average gang member looks just like the most famous rapper in the world. Actually, two of the five typical gangbangers depicted in the department's online banner concerning gang activity look just like Jay-Z. The original photos used by some magnificent dumbass with the Gangs Unit are available here. It really begs the question: Doesn't the Gangs Unit have actual photos of actual gang members for its artwork?

The graphic no longer appears on the police department's website. Instead, there's a text-only banner with the message that appears on the original banner. We haven't figured out yet the inspiration for the well-dressed Asian woman, the white dude with a bat and sunglasses, or the multi-ethnic person creepily looking on in the back. But if you see them on the streets of Miami, beware!

Via Miami New Times

Photo: Miami New Times

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The past four years have been pretty dope. We put swagger back in the White House, allowed Flavor Flav to be reinvented as a sex symbol, sent Michael Vick to jail for killing puppies and accepted him back as the Eagles quarterback. But we can't help but feel like something's been missing.

Oh yeah, it was André 3000. It's been four whole years since he released anything, and that's counting "Idlewild." "Speakerboxxx/The Love Below" came out in 2003 and we haven't seen his straw-hat-wearing ass since 2007 Comic-Con. Did he go to Africa with Dave Chappelle and miss his flight back?

We miss you, André Lauren Benjamin, and your verse on the "Dueces" remix only makes us miss you more. We want you back, and so do a bunch of your fellow rappers. In this clip from this weekend's "Sucker Free Countdown," guys like Bun B, Young Dro and DJ Drama beg André to get back in the game.

If you're dying to hear more André 3000, and you really should be, then sign this petition. It might not do anything, but maybe it will!

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LADIES Sneak Peek: Marisa Miller as the Captain's first mate [The Smoking Jacket]
Sword-wielding pirate wench is Marisa's best look yet.

BANGERS Tyga feat. Pharrell "First Time" [XXL Mag]
If you have a "hookup mix," add this.

INK 22 awesome and geeky Pac-Man tattoos [Walyou]
Hide from the ghosts between some boobies.

OUCH Game leads to a sick one punch knockout [Guyism]
He asked for it.

FEUD 6 celebrity families that should be on "Family Feud" [Unreality]
You know you'd watch the Lohans vs. the Sorrentinos.

WHAM Frotcast interviews Extremo the Clown [Film Drunk]
Is he Jack Nicholson's insane younger brother?

JUICED Jose Canseco's 30 most desperate and depressing tweets [Bro Bible]
Apparently there is crying in baseball.

GAMES The "Jersey Shore" RPG [CollegeHumor]
Grenades are everywhere.

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LADIES Baz Suicide likes red wine, chocolate and singing [Suicide Girls]
Understandably, she also likes touching herself.

BOARDS White steals spotlight, but PLG looking to snag cup [Alli Action]
Get the rundown on the Dew Cup skate vert contenders heading into the Oct. 17 finals.

OCTAGON Pop Evil partner with ex-UFC champ Frank Mir [NoiseCreep]
Former champ, forever a badass.

LATE NIGHT Nicki Minaj "Checks It Out" On Letterman With Will.i.am [Just Jared]
We're not going to say "check it out."

LOOGIES Five great moments in cinematic spitting [The Smoking Jacket]
Everyone loves saliva!

WHY? The very worst "Teenage Dream" cover [BuzzFeed]
More like "Teenage Nightmare." Right? Right?

COCO Conan O'Brien question of the day [The Daily What]
Conan's reveals his many wounds...and pulls down his pants.

BREASTS The top 10 boob trick videos [The Frisky]
Beer tastes even better when a bottle is opened by a boobie.

Photo: Suicide Girls

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There's an album coming out today called "Bullets in the Gun." If you had to guess the genre of the artist releasing said album, what would you pick? Hip-hop, right? Of course you'd pick hip-hop. You're no idiot. You are wrong though, because "Bullets in the Gun" is the latest album from Toby Keith, who's about the furthest thing from a rapper that the state of Oklahoma has ever produced.

That doesn't mean Keith isn't gangster though. He's totally channeling the spirit of his country music forefathers on this album. We're talking true badasses like Hank Williams and Merle Haggard who sang about thug life long before Tupac got it tattooed on his stomach. To celebrate Keith's album and the tradition of outlaw country, we've pulled together this list of some of the most gangster country lyrics of all-time. Some of these could have come straight off an N.W.A. album. Check 'em out!

"She jumped up and grabbed my pistol / Stuck it in the fat man's back / Said open up the safe and put your money in the sack / Then tied his hands behind him and blindfolded his eyes / Said if you're dumb enough to chase us man, you're dumb enough to die."
- Toby Keith, "Bullets in the Gun"

"His fist is big but my gun's bigger / He'll find out when I pull the trigger."
- Miranda Lambert, "Gunpowder & Lead"

"Two bodies lay crumbled, a woman, a man / His wife stood there by you, a gun in her hand."
- Stonewall Jackson, "Leona"

"I've lied an' I've stole an' I ain't fuckin' jokin' / It must've been them pills I took."
- Hank Williams III, "The Pills I Took"

"It seems there's no hope for a gangster / Not a moment of peace to be found ... For when you join up with the gangsters / It's a game you must play to the end."
- Gene Autry, "The Gangster's Warning"

"If I could move I'd get my gun / And put her in the ground / Oh Ruby, don't take your love to town."
- Kenny Rogers, "Ruby Don't Take Your Love to Town"

"And I really don't care if they shoot me down / I'll never be free again / I've got two long life turns to do / Both runnin' end to end."
- Merle Haggard, "Huntsville Lyrics"

"And I drank a fifth of courage and walked in / Lord you should've seen their frantic faces / They screamed and cried please put away that knife / I guess I'll go to hell or I'll rot here in this cell / But who taught who the cold hard facts of life."
- Porter Wagner, "Cold Hard Facts of Life"

"Well I get into a card game in a company town / Caught a miner cheating I shot the dog down / Shot the dog down, watched the man fall."
- Steve Earle, "The Devil's Right Hand"

"Sits in his car and stares at his gun / He wipes the the blood from his shirt / The sweat from his brow / He got out this time but he don't know how."
- Chris Knight, "Love and a 45"

"First time I shot her I shot her in the side / Hard to watch her suffer / But with the second shot she died."
- Johnny Cash, "Delia"

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LADIES Hot Complex: Kelly Rowland [Complex]
The video is even better.

BANGERS Drake "I Get Lonely Too" [XXL Mag]
Coming to a commercial break near you.

JACKASS Relax on the couch with Johnny Knoxville [Film Drunk]
The best kind of vomit is 3-D vomit.

ANTI-FUN NYPD pulls the plug on the "Largest Paint Party in the World" [Bro Bible]
That's paint, not pants.

WTF The most inappropriate Halloween costumes of all time [Huffington Post]
But on Halloween, there's no such thing as offensive.

MORE WTF Alabama student tells story about racist field trip [The High Definite]
Kendall's storytelling, FTW.

LAFFS Jackass for girls [CollegeHumor]
These brave ladies know it's a dangerous world out there.

RAWK Top 12 head banging, car cruising songs [Pedal to the Metal]
Get the mood just right.

Photo: Complex

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It's been announcement city over at Kanye West's Twitter the past 24 hours. First he confirmed that his new album, which didn't have a name 24 hours ago, would be out on Nov. 22. The he announced in two different tweets--it wouldn't be Kanye if he didn't make it dramatic--that the album will be called My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy. Sounds kinda creepy, right? Kanye also wrote that My Beautiful Dark Twisted Fantasy "is and always was" the title of the album, putting to bed rumors that it was going to be named Good Ass Job, which we would have told him is a far superior name if he would have asked us. Unfortunately, Kanye doesn't ask us about that kind of stuff.

Kanye dropped a few more details about the album (it will feature some of his G.O.O.D. Friday tracks and the first single will be "Dark Fantasy," which was produced by The Rza) before leaving us with this tiny picture of a "Runaway" screening he's putting on in Paris. And now you know everything there is to know about Kanye.

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It's been an extremely busy few months in prison for Lil Wayne, but that's about to end. Wayne's life will slow to a standstill this week when he enters an isolation cell at Rikers Island, known by inmates as "The Bing." The punishment--23 hours-a-day confinement until his scheduled Nov. 4 release--is a result of Weezy smuggling an MP3 player into the cement motel a few months back. That's right, an MP3 player, which, while against the rules, is hardly a deadly weapon.

So how might he spend all of this new distraction-free time? Probably like this:

+ Writing lyrics to his next single, "The Bing."

+ Determining what kind of creature he actually is.

+ Performing a show for the walls and the bed.

+ Recounting every scene from "The Rock" and "Escape From Alcatraz" in his head.

+ Attempting to escape.

+ Realizing it's not worth it with only a month to go.

+ Pondering whether prison is merely an unpleasant experience or an effective deterrent for future criminal acts.

+ Making shadow puppets.

Via NY Daily News

Photo: Getty Images

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