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Welcome to GUY CODE, the official blog of MTV2's "Guy Code" series and your online destination for all things dude, including—but not limited to—irreverent commentary on sports, hip-hop and ladies. Stay awhile and flex your manhood.

Behold, Ta-Ta-Toos, the temporary tattoos for your ta-tas (their words, not ours. We prefer the name Cleavage Calligraphy). This is not a joke, it's a real thing that you can buy with money.

We're not even going to try to figure out what the pitch meeting was like for this genius combination of skanktastic marketing and raw testosterone, but we'll gladly use the idea as an excuse to draw on some famous boobies--20 of them, to be exact. At the very least, it'll give Van Halen something to sing about for their next reunion in 10 years.

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Social media and blogs used to be a guilty habit. Now people are making entire careers out of it. We've already heard multiple people say that one of their New Year's resolutions is to be more active on Twitter or Foursquare or Tumblr. The once "time-wasters" are now on people's lists of to-dos. To get you started with the Tumblr part of your resolution, six of MTV Clutch's writers picked their favorite blogs to follow. That is, after you follow our Tumblr, and MTV Geek's Tumblr and the official MTV Tumblr.
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NFL players cannot be spokesmen for beer companies. At least, not until after they've retired, like John Elway and Joe Montana did with Coors. It wouldn't be good for the league's image. Despite this fact, football and beer are invariably linked since most fans enjoy cold ones while watching and beer ads fund the televised games. With this in mind, we decided to connect possible NFL pitchmen with some of our favorite beers. For example, Aaron Rodgers is a native of the same town where Sierra Nevada beer is brewed, so he must enjoy an IPA on occasion.

Readers liked our first round of Fake Beer Ads Featuring NFL Players so much that we decided to mock up fake ads featuring Aaron Rodgers, Jerome Simpson, Chad Ochocinco, Marshawn Lynch and Andy Dalton. There is even a bonus one for soccer fans out there.

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Credit: Getty Images

The race for the next Republican candidate officially starts today as the Iowa caucus takes off, which means it's time to start asking the serious questions. Some people say we've had a year of straight crazy from the GOP party, but really it's just been straight crazy entertainment. Meltdowns, lawsuits, mind-blowing forgetfulness and full-on right wing swagger.

We all know Barack Obama has dozens of hip-hop playlists on his iPod, and that swagger of his is so youthful it attracts those youthful votes. The Republican candidates are going to have to one up him to grab that young demo. How do they do that? Let's get real (by real, we mean completely, 100 percent just for kicks) and see what the candidates would look like if they went straight gangsta and became hip-hop stars. What would their names be? What would be their first single? Like we said, the important questions.

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Last year we demanded that Barbara Walters' monopoly over what's "most fascinating" must end. We insisted that the scope of her annual list--the 10 most fascinating people of the year--is too narrow. So to celebrate all the fascinating nonhuman things from 2011--both the glorious and miserable--we created this list, which we will now reprise for 2011.

This collection includes foods, clothing and one weapon. It's rich but we had to draw the line somewhere, so leave a comment with what you think is most fascinating nonhuman of 2011. Onwards with all the material objects and other things that don't share our DNA.

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2011 is the year big butts came roaring back and now top the booty pyramid. They've never gone completely out of style, but now huge butts are everywhere: Kim Kardashian, Serena Williams, Coco, Michelle Obama...the list goes on. Now, if you want the biggest butts, you'll find them dancing in the world of hip-hop. After a lot of photo research, soul-searching and heated debate, MTV Clutch has narrowed down the five best hip-hop booties of 2011. Who knows, they may be the best hip-hop booties of the next decade.
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Hosts Eric and Jeff Rosenthal from Its The Real have made MTV Clutch's video interview series The Check-In a must-do for any rising hip-hop and pop artist. This year they spoke to everyone from Wiz Khalifa to Sara Bareilles, Diggy Simmons to Mac Miller, Big Boi to Das Racist. To celebrate their very successful year, the guys pick their favorite Check-In moments from 2011. Watch the video to laugh and learn.

+ Check out all of our Best Of 2011 coverage on MTV's Best Of 2011 Hub

+ Follow Guy Code on Twitter, Facebook and Tumblr

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Festival of Lights, festival of Jewish women--we think it's hardly a stretch to use the beginning of Hanukkah as a reason to roll out a "Best Of" collection for the sexiest Jewish women of 2011. Hardly. You won't find any gorgeous olive-skinned Israeli women here, rather 20 Jewish American celebrities you probably know, including actresses, comediennes, musicians and models. And as for the "...of 2011,"--we applied a vague qualification standard, requiring that each woman have been reasonably active in her respective craft over the last year. That means no Amanda Bynes, who both retired and un-retired this year. And below each actress's image we've listed where you most likely saw the gal this past year. L'chaim!

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Professional football players cannot be spokesmen for beer companies. At least, not until after they've retired, like John Elway and Joe Montana did with Coors. That wouldn't be good for the NFL's image, even though most of their fans drink beer every Sunday and beer companies are major football sponsors. In fact, we were drinking a few yesterday while watching Tim Tebow lead another improbable winning rally against the Chicago Bears and we though about which players would make perfect spokespeople for various beers. With Tebow living in the Rockies, Coors Light seems the perfect fit. We also brainstormed brew matchups for Ray Lewis, Tom Brady, Adrian Peterson, Arian Foster and Ndamukong Suh. Check out our fake ads below.
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