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If you have a beard, you will repel women. It's something that's long been suspected, but now it's science. According to the Daily Mail, 200 women rated men with and without their beards, and found the clean-shaven look "significantly more attractive." Presumably the food bits resting on pillows of coarse chin hair didn't help the bearded cause.
That said, beards add "gravitas," probably because (Brooklyn notwithstanding) men with beards are usually seen wiping their brows, making their own beef jerky, or giving great directions. Basically, a glorious mass of face fur does "little to attract women" but it totally warns other bros to step the EFF off.
You know how we always hear that women dress not for us, but for other women? Well, yeah, it looks like we do that, too. We may say we're growing the beard out of sheer laziness, but evolution says we're trying to regain some of that alpha-dog mojo--which explains the concept of playoff beards.
So unless you're in the midst of a Cinderella run, shave that thing. Granted, you don't have to go all baby's bottom, because the research found that light stubble got "the highest ratings from women." Shave on Sunday, get laid on Friday night. It's science.
If getting laid isn't reason enough to start shaving, check out this funny yet information video from the Dollar Shave Club. Great idea for a company and marketing video: