Posted 4 hours ago by Guy Code Staff in Ladies, Photos
Photo via Busted Coverage
Basketball season is almost over and baseball doesn't have cheerleaders. NCAA football, starting August 29th, seems impossibly far away. To keep you occupied in the meantime, Busted Coverage has compiled a comprehensive gallery of ladies in jerseys, team-branded underwear and a couple just wearing pendants. (That does it, we're going back to college. Right after we click through the slideshow one more time...)
Posted 7 hours ago by Will Garre in Comedy, Ladies
Credit: Chris Hondros/Getty Images
Have you ever sincerely tried to woo a special lady, but somehow made her feel like Jabba the Hutt? How could your words be so misconstrued?
In the dicey world of flattery, you must be a skilled diplomat of male-female relations. Before anything comes out of your mouth, inspect it and translate it into lady-speak. Otherwise, when you say, "You look beautiful today," she might hear, "You look beautiful today, but on every other day you're hideous."
To help ensure that your compliments are complimentary, we asked three female comedians to run our tender words through their insult filters. The results are so shocking, we might never say anything nice about anyone again.
Posted 9 hours ago by Guy Code Staff in Ladies
We recently gave you "5 Ways To Convince Your Girlfriend To Watch Porn." And we're gonna stand by it, with one major caveat from last night's episode of "Girl Code." Turns out, this joint activity can blow up in your face (uh...so to speak). Read on for that lesson and a few others that the gals just taught us.
Women are always complaining that porn gives dudes unrealistic standards. Like how "butt stuff is the norm," Jamie Lee says. As Jessimae Peluso explains, "I'm never going to be excited to be rammed by a football team. That's never going to be my happy day."
Well, if you watch it with your girlfriend, she might likewise wonder why you don't have the "giant, massive c***" of the guy onscreen," Tanisha Long says. She might even get "mad" at your "normal one." Nicole Byer adds, "You don't have that much stamina in you. You're gonna pump twice and be done!"
So, keep your girlfriend's expectations grounded in reality, however unrealistic yours are.
Some guys will sloppily make out with chicks in public, just to prove they're not losers. Ironically, this is a great way to repulse women.
"If it's something cute like holding holds or putting your arm around me, I like it," Carly Aquilino says, "but I'm not trying to get pregnant in the middle of the street."
Be especially careful of grunting and saliva-related noises. "Your affection for each other has gone a little too far if I can hear it," Jamie says. And Esther Ku warns that PDA can become PDE: Public Display of Erection.
Of course, we're talking about women, so nothing's simple. Too much PDA is bad, but not enough will get you dumped. Unwillingness to publicly touch indicates that you have "10 other girlfriends in the area," according to Melanie Iglesias.
Posted 6/18/13 3:00 pm EST by Kathy Iandoli in Ladies, Music
Credit: Epic Records
One of the categories at this year's O Music Awards is "Too Much Ass For TV," which honors the backsides that infiltrated recent music videos from Robin Thicke, Frank Ocean, David Bowie, Sigur Ros and DIIV.
Of course, the derrière has been the star of music videos for quite some time, dilating pupils since video killed the radio star. There are many historical butts that deserve recognition. Here are five booty-filled classics that we'd especially like to commemorate.
Remember that really weird era when J.Lo and Ben Affleck were a thing? Well, in the video for "Jenny From the Block," Miss Lopez was all about showing off her signature backside for her boo. And for everyone else.
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Posted 6/17/13 2:00 pm EST by Sean Green in Funny, Ladies
Credit: Ethan Miller / Getty Images
Bikinis, babes and booze -- it's no wonder that pool parties are one of the premiere places to pick up on chicks. Use these surefire lines, so the only thing that's hung out to dry is your towel.
Why It Will Work: A great way to make your intentions clear while showing off your mastery of the double entendre. She'll probably think you're an English professor.
Why It Will Work: "Slippery when wet" is a reference to a Bon Jovi album, and hot chicks dig Bon Jovi, especially older ones from when the band was in their sexual prime.
Posted 6/17/13 12:00 pm EST by Guy Code Staff in Ladies
Credit: Digital Vision
How is it that 90-year-old billionaires can score with gorgeous models, while guys in our physical primes can't even get a date? Should you apply to business school just for the sake of your sex life? Is money that important to the ladies?
Well, it's not quite that simple. As our friends at BroBible explain, yeah, stability can be a factor...but more importantly, ambition matters:
This is absolutely key, if you can show any woman that you're a valuable investment, she will be with you (bang you) even if RIGHT NOW, you're absolutely broke...Women aren't looking for your money, that's not what they want.
If you're broke you can still be ambitious. She will stick by your side knowing that even though you don't have anything right now, your hard work and dedication will pay out in the end. This means that she's sticking with you because you've managed to present yourself as a valuable investment.
However, there's a catch: Ambition can still lead to failure. Click through to find out exactly how long you have to make it to the top...or at least, to make it off your futon.
Posted 6/17/13 11:00 am EST by Aaron Goldfarb in Funny, Ladies
Credit: Stuart McClymont
They say chivalry is dead. Well, of course it is -- technology has just made it too easy for us guys. Here are the time-saving gadgets that turned gentlemen into lazy sloths with zero class.
The quintessential chivalrous guy move is holding open a door for a lovely lady. Then, revolving doors were invented. What to do now? Spin her through it like a top? (Actually, that sounds kinda fun.)
For nearly a century, when taking a girl out for a ride in his wheels, a guy would unlock her door before unlocking his. Now, though, you can unlock both simultaneously. Convenient, but not chivalrous. Bleep bloop.
Nothing says chivalry like presenting the woman you love with a beautiful bouquet of flowers. Long ago, that might have involved going to the garden to pick a batch. Just a decade ago, you would've visited a professional florist. Now? You punch in her address, your credit card info and click your mouse a few times. How romantic.
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Posted 6/13/13 1:55 pm EST by RG Daniels in Ladies, Movies
Credit: Warner Bros.
Technically speaking, Superman is an alien, not a "guy." But, in addition to being stronger and faster than human dudes, he's suaver. In preparation for one of this summer's biggest blockbusters, we're breaking down the lessons that guys can learn from that Kryptonian in a blue onesie.
...at least, not to a girl that you've just started dating. We ain't saying you should lie to her -- Superman represents truth, justice and the American way, remember? -- but you don't want to scare her off with TMI right away. Be a Clark Kent up front, until you're close enough with your Lois Lane to reveal your thing for spandex and outer-underwear.
Superman wears that costume underneath his suit at all times -- the dude is ready to go. Likewise, you should keep a spare shirt at your girlfriends' place, in case you ever sleep over on a work night.... Also, keep a spare shirt at the office, because coffee stains and summer perspiration are your arch-nemeses.
Posted 6/11/13 4:58 pm EST by Marty Beckerman in Ladies, Tattoos
Credit: Sean Murphy
Even though we're big Suicide Girls fans here, no guy will admit to finding lower back tattoos sexy -- especially not clichéd butterflies -- but some of us might be keeping our true feelings secret, according to a new French study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior. Men are considerably more likely to hit on ladies with so-called "tramp stamps."
For the experiment, nearly a dozen college-age girls lounged on the beach for three weeks. (Tough gig.) Half the time, they wore temporary tattoos, which positively correlated with pickup attempts. "Significantly more men approached (the women) when they exhibited a tattoo," the researchers concluded.
Here's the weird part: The guys didn't rate the temporarily tattooed girls as hotter, just "more likely to have a date" with them. The researchers chalk it up to a "stereotype of promiscuousness associated with tattoos." So, those dudes weren't really attracted to butterfly tats...just to whatever they thought they could get without much effort.
(Of course, that attitude won't get you laid anyway, as Rambo Suicide explains.)
Posted 6/10/13 12:55 pm EST by Adam K. Raymond in Ladies, Music
Photos: Getty Images/WireImage
At this year's O Music Awards on June 19, three legends worthy of having their faces tattooed on your calf are up for the Analog Genius Award for using old technology in new ways. They are Neil Young, Beck and Jack White. (Daft Punk are also nominated, but we're not ready to elevate them to portrait-tat status.)
In addition to groundbreaking work, all three of these guys are lyrical sages. Their songs contain as many nuggets of relationship advice as lurid drug references. Today, we focus on the former. Here are enlightening pieces of relationship advice that worked for them and might work for you. (International fame, otherworldly creativity and millions of dollars probably help, too.)
From "When Your Lonely Heart Breaks":
When your lonely heart breaks
Don't sit counting your mistakes
Don't be waiting
for love to come back
Don't be wastin' time
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