Maybe 10 years from now, no one will talk to each other on the phone. Talking on the phone is bad for you. We're less intelligent when we're forced to think while we speak, and we listen worst when we can tune out the speaker and surf the web with near impunity.So yeah, texting your mom makes you a better person than calling her.
But that doesn't mean everyone who texts is as smart as the idea of texting is itself--a douchebag will always be a douchebag. When time traveling gets invented, there'll be people who only want to go Woodstock '99 and the Roman Empire. Those are the same guys who suck at texting, and they're just plain obnoxious when it comes to flirting with women. There's all types of obnoxious texters. Don't be these guys.
For more on texting, watch "Guy Code" tonight at 11/10c on MTV2
Cock blocking is a shameful behavior for guys. Oh, for chicks it might be the sign of a good friend, but no dude stops his buddy from getting laid. (He's too drunk to notice the love handles and tramp stamp poking out of her low-cut jeans? It's cool. It's something for him to hold onto.)
But there are certain situations, however rare, when cock blocking is necessary for a friend's own good. Because guys value a select few things more than sex: self-respect, STD-free junk and staying out of jail.
1. She's A Grenade
This goes way past love handles and tramp stamps. Your friend has had too many tequila shots to notice her chin hairs and missing teeth. It's your duty to protect him from waking up to this creature; if you have to, sound the grenade whistle right in his ear.
For more on cock blocking, watch "Guy Code" Tuesday at 11/10c on MTV2
Last night "Guy Code" (watch full episode here) put a name to a reaction that we've all done in at some point in our lives, "Friend Zone Face," and it's taken off online. But that was only a small part of last night's episode. The cast unraveled the mysteries of losing your virginity ("You put the P in the V. That's when you become a G." - Damien Lemon), birthdays ("If you have to throw your own party, make sure it's an extravaganza." - Donnell Rawlings), being sick ("I don't mind hooking up with a guy if he's sick and it's not contagious." - Lisa Ramos) and knowing the code to all things gay (Guy Code is all about being proud of who your are.)
As a quick recap, we offer some of our favorite moments in GIFs.
The Season Three Premiere of "Guy Code" (watch full episode here) dissected the topics of boners, getting fat, getting married and house parties. Oh, and don't forget the memorable "Wingman: The Movie (Trailer)"...and the even more memorable "Hot Girl On A Bike."
Today we've re-created some of those moments in GIF form in case you missed the episode, or in case you like your information better in silent two-second looping packages. Any time you have a question and need to consult the Code, these are here for your quick reference. Like Cliff's Notes, but without all the reading.
Enjoy them. Share them. Live them.
This post could be called "The Butt Fumble and other embarrassing plays," but we have decided to join the Jets' ineptitude with other teams' comical failings. That said, Mark Sanchez and the Jets are responsible for one quarter of the content in this post. Indeed: Just End This Season. But the Kansas City Chiefs provided Gang Green some competition, prompting us to devote an entire section to their gaffes too. Only one more week of misery, although these GIFs will live on forever.
Even in the No Fun League, there are opportunities to let loose, dance or playfully taunt the opposition. Above, J.J. Watt takes Aaron Rodgers' title belt and chucks it like a cheap piece of leather. You can get away with that if you're the likable, mammoth 6' 5" 300-pound league leader in sacks and passes swatted.
Previously we rounded up the most acrobatic plays of the 2012 regular season and the most embarrassing plays and now present the best celebration dances, with a double dose of Jacoby Jones and triple shot of Von Miller. Giddy up.
Whooooooeeeeee!! Every season without fail, NFL players serve up dozens of acrobatic moves that straight video alone won't satiate the need to marvel. The cream of this year's crop incude one handed grabs, fancy footwork, incredible quarterback scrambles (with regrets to statuesque Joe Flacco, Matt Schaub and others), helicopters and hurdles. Props to SB Nation, Deadspin, The Big Lead, Bleacher Report and others who dropped the majority of these GIFs. They appear below in no particular order, although we felt compelled to give cover honors to Vic Ballard and his backwards spinning leap.
College and high school marching bands are an integral part of football's pageantry. It takes an awful lot of practice and (yes) athletic ability to swirl around a football field with a tuba or clarinet without missing a note. But the task is not without risk: it's pretty damn easy to miss a step and fall face-first into a pile of chewed-up grass.
So with this collection of band fail GIFs, we're not only laughing at them; we're also sympathizing... but we're mostly laughing.
Jaguars head coach Mike Mularkey lost it last night after effusively praised wunderkid Andrew Luck took a QB sneak into the endzone to put the Colts up 17-0 . A coach launching his headset is the universal sign of complete and utter frustration. Some guys are known for having short fuses, some others who usually lay low have lost their tempers and chucked the hardware. In all cases, the scene is thoroughly entertaining. Inspired by Mularkey, check out 10 of the best GIFs and images of these headphone tosses known to man.
Steve Spurrier's sidearm toss
We're nearly one full week into Movember, or No Shave November, the hairiest month of the year. It's also a worldwide campaign to raise awareness of men's health issues -- mainly prostate and testicular cancer -- as well as funds for research and treatment. (It's not too late to sign up, either.)
It's a great cause and a solid reason to put down the razor and let the hair fly. Save money on razors and shaving cream, help other men, terrify others with disturbing facial creations. That's a win-win-win. Lots of guys also take pictures throughout November and show their progress in GIFs. Which brings us to this 12-pack of GIFs after the jump: