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Welcome to GUY CODE, the official blog of MTV2's "Guy Code" series and your online destination for all things dude, including—but not limited to—irreverent commentary on sports, hip-hop and ladies. Stay awhile and flex your manhood.

Lindsay Ames' original comedy series of shorts is back at MTV Clutch! "How To End A Date In 30 Seconds Or Less" showcases a variety of horrible dates that end faster than it takes to text message someone to get lost. This latest one features a man that has an interesting talent. "Interesting" is an overstatement and "talent" actually means "something most 10-year-old boys can do." Still his dedication to it during his first date with Lindsay is impressive.

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NBC has released promos for Eli Manning's upcoming hosting gig on "Saturday Night Live" and, to paraphrase former Cardinals coach Denny Green, he's a little bit awkward and definitely not as funny as Peyton. Eli goes back-and-forth with Kenan Thompson for most of the spot. The 6' 4," two-time Super Bowl winner says "hosting" and "SNL" eight times, which wouldn't be notable except that Eli has a little bit of a lisp. That's nothing to be ashamed of, but the producers probably wouldn't ask a one-legged man to jump rope for an entire sketch.

Overall, the promo is just OK but we still have hope because Eli's appearance brings a wealth of sketch possibilities: Eli overhears the writers discussing how Eli isn't very funny; cast members repeatedly call him Peyton during the monologue; Lorne Michaels mistakes the youngish looking Eli for an NBC page and yells at him. A Reddit commenter suggested an "MTV Cribs" episode where Eli's house is a shrine to himself and Cooper Manning is the butler.

Peyton set the bar for NFL players on "SNL" pretty high. Read on for Peyton's best sketch plus the top acts from other football studs on the show.

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NFL offensive linemen get very little press but the Brothers Kalil have earned some face time for an eventful few days they've had. The Minnesota Vikings drafted the younger, more-massive brother, Matt Kalil, fourth overall in the year's NFL Draft on Thursday and will promptly be installed as the team's left tackle.

His elder brother, Ryan Kalil, center for the Carolina Panthers, was just selected number 99 on the NFL's list of the top 100 players of the 2012. NFL Network anchor Lindsay Rhodes spoke with Kalil about the recognition and it turned into a gloriously awkward four-minute segment as Kalil mocked the list's arbitrariness while Rhodes persisted with a straight face. However, the top-100 status did earn Kalil a video segment with Will Ferrell who dressed up like Jackie Moon, exposed his  powder-white thighs and tried to teach the big man a thing or two about protecting something valuable from a defensive tackle -- a Twinkie.

Watch the video on NFL.com

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Yesterday, the hilarious, absurd, one-time MTV personality Andy Milonakis took to reddit for an AMA (ask me anything) session answering  fan questions and uncovering the many mysteries of "The Andy Milonakis Show" and his comedic sensibilities. From his Internet videos that went viral before "going viral" was even a phrase, to his cameos on "Jimmy Kimmel Live!", Milonakis was one of the web generation's first breakout comedy stars.

Despite his recent slide out of the spotlight, it's no surprise he still has a huge online following. He answered everything they threw at him, touching on his unironic dedication to rap, cured meats, smoking with Snoop Dogg and who he likes better: Charlie Sheen or Ashton Kutcher. He'll even loan you some money! So read on to see our favorite exchanges from the hilarious stream-of-consciousness chat session. We didn't even edit out the bad grammar and spelling errors, so you get the complete picture. Read More...

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If you're not familiar with the best new show on cable, MTV2's "Nitro Circus Live," or the funny/awesome web series "Roner Vision," allow us to introduce you to professional skier, BASE jumper and all-around mad man Erik Roner. He's been a part of the Nitro Circus Crew since 2005, when Travis Pastrana asked for him to help BASE jump dirt bikes into the Grand Canyon. As a result, Roner was featured in two seasons of MTV's "Nitro Circus," a sold-out world tour and the upcoming movie "Nitro Circus 3D." Somehow he also finds time to produce and star in his own video web series "Roner Vision," which is a must-watch for any action sports fans.

Unfortunately, as of late, Erik has been laid-up at home after a nasty crash involving an avalanche. Since he can't be out amongst his fans, MTV Clutch is bringing him to you live via satellite (on tape). Ryan McKee: Animated Blogger discusses his favorite scenes from "Nitro Circus Live," his accident, skiing and even draws a girlfriend for McKee.

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The big winner of "Think Like a Man"--which knocked "The Hunger Games" off its perch after a four-week run at number one-- is Steve Harvey, who made a number one movie that made his own book the centerpiece of the thing ("Act Like a Lady, Think Like a Man"). Now that is some serious cross/self-promotion. But the real big winner, to us at least, is comedian Kevin Hart. "Think Like a Man" is an ensemble style movie and Hart, as you would expect, plays the excitable, funny man. Based on his stand-up, that's pretty much Kevin Hart in real life (say it with your chest!). Meagan Good is pretty easy on the eyes but we could have used even more screen time from Hart. And what a year for the comedian. Earlier this year he won MVP at the NBA All-Star Weekend Celebrity Game, throw in a role in a number one movie and  all he needs to do for the remainder of 2012 is release another Comedy Central special and he'll win the just-invented Clutch Triple Crown. Here's MTV Clutch's Check-In duo talking with Hart at the All-Star Weekend.

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The world falls into two categories: those who are intrigue by Karl Pilkington and those who have never heard of him. Because to know Pilkington is to love him...or at least to be bewildered by him. He's a 40-year-old English radio producer turned radio personality turned our newest obsession. If you're not familiar with Pilkington, British comedian Ricky Gervais has described him as a lovable idiot, like a real-life Homer Simpson.

Since teaming with Gervais and Steven Merchant to do "The Ricky Gervais Show" podcast, Karl Pilkington has become a cult celebrity. In 2010, Pilkington got his own reality show, "An Idiot Abroad." That same year, HBO adapted the podcast into an animated televised version where Ricky and Steven ask Karl his opinions about people and the world. His answers are always fascinating.

The third season of "The Ricky Gervais Show" returns to HBO tonight, April 20. To celebrate the show's return, and to introduce those uninitiated to Pilkington, here are 20 of the lovable idiot's best quotes.
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From the top of Mt. Tabor, in the park where I fell asleep for two hours like a hungover homeless man.

The fifth annual Bridgetown Comedy Fest has come to an end. This is the part where the overdose of amazing comedy and a great city wears off and the withdrawal and mild depression begins! I'd like to believe my crash will come because of the laughter withdrawal, but in actuality, it's probably more because of the refined sugar and alcohol withdrawal. Regardless, it's going to be a long week.

I skipped over Saturday because I didn't have any shows to perform on. I spent the afternoon and evening show-hopping. The only show I ended up watching in its entirety was "As Seen on TV," a show at Portland's Helium comedy club, hosted by Paul Goebel (from Comedy Central's "Beat The Geeks").
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Friday is day two of the Bridgetown fest. Lots more comedy, lots more donuts, lots more booze. The best/worst part of all of that is that it's free for me. Just another low-level show business perk. News of last night's cheeseburger incident spread through the Twitterverse, and by that I mean two people who were at the show mentioned it:

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PORTLAND, OR: home to Powell's books, Carrie Brownstein and the Bridgetown Comedy Festival, currently in its fifth year. The festival has grown from a handful of venues, including including the basement of producer Andy Wood, to nine plus stages including a two theaters and a major comedy club.

This is my first year at the festival. I'm excited to leave NYC for some greener scenery fresh air and make the flight with fellow comic Emily Heller, who decides to eat a box of onion rings and have a one-woman mile-high fart off. When we arrive in Portland, the fresh air almost knocks me over. Probably because I flew next to someone who attempting to completely replace all the oxygen in the plane with her own gas.


 Emily Heller fuels up

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