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7 Imagined Features In Will.I.Am's New Car, IAMAUTO

Posted 1/10/12 4:00 pm EST by in Cars, Celebs, News

Black Eyed Peas' Will.i.am told Jay Leno that he's starting his own car company called IAMAUTO. His intent is to create more jobs in his birthplace of East Los Angeles while also fulfilling his need to live in a more "TRON"-like world. The car is a futuristic sporty ride built on a Chrysler chassis using a lot of OEM parts. That will ensure this concept-looking ride remains street legal when it ends up in mass production.

Will.i.am didn't give Leno any details on the starting price, or when it will be available to the super-rich public, or any of the car's other features besides the signature Beats By Dr. Dre sound system. Luckily, we're experts at making wild guesses on what selling points an automobile designed by a mildly insane celebrity will offer. Here are seven features we imagine the IAMAUTO cars will include.
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Rubbernecker: Tattoo Come To You

Posted 1/4/12 2:00 pm EST by in Cars, Tattoos

Comedian Tom Sibley created the popular blog Subway Douchery, which makes fun of subway dimwits. Now he lives in subway-deficient Los Angeles and must mock people on the roads as Rubbernecker.

FINALLY! The only thing that was really holding me back from covering my body in ironic tattoos was the inconvenience of actually going to the tattoo parlor. Who wants to deal with all those rowdy drunken sailors or giggling groups of 20-year-old ladies who continue to get tramp stamps for unknown desperate reasons? It was only a matter of time until some genius created a tetanus delivery van!

When having needles burrowed deep into your skin and rolling the proverbial dice with any number of intravenously transferred diseases, you want safety and hygiene to be of the utmost importance. And nothing says, "TOTALLY CLEAN!" like a friggin' van! It's not like windowless white vans have any kind of negative stigma in modern culture. With any luck, vans like this will be as common as ice cream trucks on the Fourth of July and they'll happily usher in the apocalypse.

Want Tom to mock a photo you took? Tweet it to @TheTomSibley or @MTVClutch.

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The Breakdown: DeLorean DMC-12 [Infographic]

Posted 11/10/11 4:30 pm EST by in Cars, Infographic

[CLICK IMAGE FOR FULL SIZE]

The classic stainless steel sports car (in name only) was a financial, mechanical and legal disaster. Its founder and visionary creator John DeLorean became a criminal flim-flam artist who used government funds to give the highly unemployed Irish people an ounce of hope, only to have it snatched away again. In addition, many of its chief developers became disgraced businessmen with criminal records, lost their careers and even their freedom in some instances.

Ultimately, the only true survivor of the DeLorean Motor Company's downfall is the car itself. It's sleek and shiny design, jagged rear windshield and gull wing doors made it iconic even before "Back to the Future" secured its pop culture immortality. Even though the original Ireland factory long ago closed its doors, DeLorean fans continue to keep the dream alive. Those diehards will be rewarded for their efforts in the near future. Recently, there was an announcement that an electric model of the classic car, the DMCEV, will be released.

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Swizz Beatz Buys Alicia Keys Lotus For His Birthday

Posted 9/16/11 3:58 pm EST by in Cars, Celebs

As we told you yesterday, everyone's favorite hip-hop producer named after cheese, Swizz Beatz, may have a domestic scandal brewing. Allegedly, he's doing things with little-known singer Christina Elizabeth that he should be doing with his wife, very well-known singer Alicia Keys.

Today we learn Swizz, in a seemingly Kobe-like move, purchased his wife an alledged "Damn baby, I'm sorry" present. The gift? A brand-new red Lotus. And the timing of couldn't be stranger, on Swizz's birthday. Who gives someone a present on his own birthday? Someone who is trying very hard not to sleep on the couch. Although we image their couch is much nicer than our beds.

Photo: Twitter

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New Pagani Huayra's Key Is A Mini Pagani Huayra

Posted 9/13/11 3:30 pm EST by in Cars, Gadgets, Video

There is something very surreal and "Twilight Zone"-ish about a car that can only be started by a smaller version of itself. It looks and sounds cool, but we're a little afraid of being sucked into a fifth dimension where hamsters are treated as gods. Our weird fears didn't stop the makers of the new Pagani Huayra, a follow-up to the terror-inducing super-car Zonda, from actually bringing such a bizarre design to life.

Pictured above is the actual key that future owners of this $1.3 million behemoth will use. The aluminum mini car is made from the same metal as the wheels and comes apart to reveal an ignition key and a USB drive for drivers to load their favorite songs on the car's stereo. May we suggest the "Twilight Zone" theme?

Source: Top Speed

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Today's Badass: Porsche Driver Wins Race Despite Losing Tire

Posted 9/8/11 4:30 pm EST by in Cars, Today's Badass, Video

Normally the words "Porsche," "driver" and "badass" wouldn't been seen together in the same sentence, but this racer smashed that hard and fast gearhead rule during a recent race in Baltimore. Racer Jeroen Bleekemolen took a wrong turn on the track during a qualifying race for the GT3 Baltimore Grand Prix and lost his left front tire, leaving him with a very thin grasp for the lead.

The rules state cars can only use one set of tires during the race. So instead of punching the steering wheel and crawling into the fetal position on the front seat in a puddle of tears, Bleekemolen parks on the track, runs after the lost tire, throws it on the front seat and races over to the pit lane. His crew throws the tire back on and he goes on to reach the checkered flag in time.

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Two Glimpses Into The Future of Pimpmobiles

Posted 9/7/11 1:15 pm EST by in Cars, Gadgets

The future is a very uncertain place, particularly when it comes to cars. Will our love for all things running on fossil fuels melt the polar ice caps and usher in a new ice age? Will cars become obsolete when science finally develops an erection pill that makes you fly?

Pimps, on the other hand, are car lovers who don't have to worry about their future rides. Those fun-loving, nightlife livers have a bright future on four wheels. That's because two new "pimpmobiles" have been unveiled; one by a major player in the automotive industry and one by a very ambitious car conversion firm. The first, pictured above, is Citroën's newest concept car called the Tubik, a car name that sounds like a noise every man makes during their prostate exam. However, the experience it offers on the inside more than makes up for it. The second is a car covered completely in leather. Seriously? Seriously.
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8 Celebrity Crashes Where We Asked About The Car First

Posted 9/5/11 12:00 pm EST by in Cars, Celebs

Even though we have fun at the expense of the rich and famous, we'd never wish actual harm on any of them. Sure, the overexposure of Lindsay Lohan and Justin Bieber can make our news and entertainment bland at times. That being said, their lives of wanton excess and reckless disregard for the finer things have affected a noticeable but unspoken race of beings: cars. Whether it's a night of drunken driving or just good ol' fashioned stupidity, some of the biggest names in the business have dented, wrecked and outright totaled cars that we'd gladly give parts of our body just to play with the manual transmission for five minutes.

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Paul Wall Channels 'Mario Kart' To Win Dirtball Challenge

Posted 8/30/11 3:00 pm EST by in Cars, Celebs, Music, Sports, TV

On on the final episode of "The DUB Magazine Project," Texas's own Paul Wall takes the Kawasaki Dirtball Challenge and attempts to jerk New Boyz out of their number one spot. Paul Wall is the last competitor for the title; he brings his Cadillac Escalade ESV, an unbelievable grill and some serious swagger to the game.

"Drive slow at all times," Paul Wall says on his way to the dirt track. That's great advice when rolling around Texas in an $80,000 Escalade, but not when you're trying to beat the current record of 1:04.6. Lucky for him, he decides to not drive slow this time and uses his mad "Mario Kart skills" to beat the New Boyz record by nearly three seconds. Congratulations, Paul Wall, you're the fastest dirtball of all. Have fun with your new Kawasaki ride.

Watch the full episode of "The Dub Magazine Project."

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New Boyz Have Mad Driving Skillz In 'The DUB Magazine Project'

Posted 8/22/11 5:29 pm EST by in Cars, Celebs, Music, TV, Video

Ben J and Legacy of the New Boyz are the sixth competitors in Kawasaki’s Dirtball Challenge on this week’s "The DUB Magazine Project." After arriving in their “limo Mercedes van,” a custom $130,000 Mercedes Benz Jetline Sprinter, Legacy admits he doesn’t really know how to drive and seems uneasy. Well, the rock star life he’s been living since “You’re A Jerk” went viral two years ago must give him nerves of steel. After a quick lesson around the track, Ben J jumps in the passenger side and they’re off (after a few stalled seconds not realizing the clock began). Even though Ben J kind of screams like a girl and distracts Legacy, they still post the fastest time yet, 1:04.6.

Watch the New Boyz's victory and the rest of Episode 7 online.

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