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The 7 Greatest NBA All-Star Celebrity Game Performances By Celebs

Posted 2/8/13 5:00 pm EST by in Celebs, Sports


Photos: Jason Merritt/Getty Images, Ethan Miller/Getty Images

Most celebrities who hit the hardcourt for the NBA's annual celebrity game (modeled on MLB's Celebrity Softball Game and probably MTV's Rock N' Jock) just make the real players fall asleep. But a few, from A-listers to D-listers, have surprising athletic talent.

Next Friday will mark the game's 10th anniversary--for which Trey Songz, Ne-Yo and reigning MVP Kevin Hart will suit up--so we're looking back on the top celeb performances. (Honorable mentions to "Guy Code" alums Vinny Guadagnino and Common.)

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The 10 Most Disliked Athletes' Most Redeeming Qualities

Posted 2/8/13 10:15 am EST by in Funny, News, Sports


Photos: Getty Images

Even the most rotten, loathsome athletes possess some positive quality. For example something that makes you say, "I'd like to gouge his face with a salmonella-infested spork, but dammit, he was really nice to that sweet old lady."

Forbes recently released its 2013 list of America's Most Disliked Athletes, which is "based on the latest public surveys from Nielsen Sports and market research firm E-Poll." But what are we -- the fans, observers and members of the media -- if we can't recognize a silver lining, a wrinkle of pleasantness or charity? Unforgiving and cold, maybe.

Not buying it? We're not sure either, but we've already committed to finding each athlete's redeeming quality, so let's do this s***.

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15 Manly Kitchen Accessories [Photos]

Posted 2/7/13 1:45 pm EST by in Food, Funny, Photos


Photos: seriouseats/tumblr

Only a moron claims that real men don't cook. Food's the best, and your next BBQ will be even better with a Stone Age meat tenderizer and a teapot hilariously shaped like a boner. Here's a bunch of kitchen accessories--some homemade, others sold commercially--that'll help turn your kitchen into your man cave. Ready? Let's get cookin'.

1. Batman kitchen apron


Photo: tomztoyz

Na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na na APRON!

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Melanie Iglesias & Donnell Rawlings Reddit IAmA Recap

Posted 1/30/13 1:00 pm EST by in Interview, MTV2, The Show


Credit: Picture Group

Melanie Iglesias and Donnell Rawlings from "Guy Code" chilled with Reddit yesterday, fielding a variety of questions about the show, their careers and, uh, chest hair. The duo dispensed Guy Code wisdom, Donnell dished about his character Ashy Larry from "Chappelle's Show" and Mel received the inevitable come-ons, but responded with good humor. (Seriously, guys, just enter the "Win a Date with Melanie Contest.")

Here's our favorite questions and answers...

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15 Outrageous Player-Fan Altercations [Videos]

Posted 1/30/13 11:00 am EST by in Sports, Video


Photos: YouTube

A disturbing thing happened on the pitch last week when Chelsea midfielder Eden Hazard kicked the crap out of a ball boy who took a nap on the ball as Hazard stood by him waiting for it. Or, at least, Hazard kicked some crap out of the 17-year-old, whose attempt to drain the clock for hometown Swansea City was a laughable move that SI.com's Georgia Turner likened to "half-assed flopping" in the Premier League.

No doubt emotions run high at sporting events and occasionally players go Full Artest. Are you not entertained?!?! Elsewhere recently, a Buffalo Sabres referee got a bit too aggressive with winger Nathan Gerbe when he grabbed Gerbe and shoved him against the boards after the winger took a cheap pop from the opposition.

Here's a rundown of some insane incidents when s*** got real between players and fans.

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Russian Basketball Coach Makes Highly Illegal, Highly Awesome Play

Posted 1/28/13 6:30 pm EST by in Funny, Sports, Video


Photo: YouTube

It was just your average half court set by the UNICS Kazan of Russia's PBL basketball league, until the point guard passed it around the horn into a pair of unexpected hands. "UNBELIEVABLE!" writes the Russian fellow who uploaded the footage. "A Russian basketball coach has the assist of the year as his team score a three pointer."

Unfortunately, head coach Gundars Vetra's UNICS (we know, we know -- there's a team named UNICS, in all caps) ultimately fell to the Spartak Primorie, as the three pointer did not count. Also, the video lacked a Stephon Marbury, Vladimir Putin, Allen Iverson or Adam Morrison cameo as we had hoped. Nevertheless, a great play and the crowd lapped it up. Check it.

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How To Measure Your Penis With A Smartphone

Posted 1/25/13 5:00 pm EST by in News


Photo: VSM Enterprises

So you want to know your dong size, but a ruler is too low-tech and old-fashioned for a gadget enthusiast like you. Well, it's your lucky day, because there's an app for that: "Penis and Condom Sizer," available for 99 cents. Send your thanks to the developers at VSM Enterprises, which we're hoping has a strict privacy policy. Here's the pitch:

Have you ever wondered how you stack up to the rest of the world? How about to another entire ethnicity? Do you need to figure out what condom size you are? Find out how you compare to the following ethnicities:

*Caucasian Penis Size
*African American Penis Size
*Asian Penis Size
*Indian Penis Size
*Middle Eastern Penis Size

Wow, that's a whole lot of racial stereotypes. (Paging Jonah Falcon.) Too bad the only customer review at Google Play calls the sizer "worthless" and questions its accuracy: "According to this app, a 49 inch penis with a half inch girth wears XML condoms while a 2 inch penis with a 17 inch girth needs regular condoms. This app is super lame and I want my money back."

So, maybe guys should agree to stick with wooden rulers to measure our woodies. 'Cause the next time you make a call with your friend's phone, you just might be holding his penis skin cells against your face. All 49 inches of them.

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Today's Dumbass: Prostitute Enters Police Station In Search Of Client

Posted 1/25/13 1:45 pm EST by in Today's Dumbass


Photo: Columbia Pictures Television

Come hell, high water or a meeting place crying, "You're going to get arrested!", 20-year-old Portland call girl Christal D. Smith was going to meet her John. And she did -- only the client was not a client but a member of the Salem, Oregon Police Department that solicited her services through a website, phone calls and text messages.  (By the way, that's a younger William Shatner from '80s cop show "T.J. Hooker".)

A genius she is not but you've got to respect her commitment to customer satisfaction. According to the AP, Smith drove 50 miles to the Salem PD, walked past uniformed officers toward an unmarked door where she tried to reach the dude.  That's Manti Te'o level gullible right there. Police arrested her on charges of prostitution and promoting prostitution.

Anyhow, we're going to be at the 19th hole at Augusta tonight with Dave Chappelle, a bottle of Johnny Walker blue, some female extras from "Entourage," 200 pounds of blue crystal meth, and definitely no cops, if anyone is down.

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A Curious Case Of Man Boobs: German Soldiers Forming Left Breasts

Posted 1/24/13 2:00 pm EST by in News


Photo: Sean Gallup/Getty Images

A recent medical study has revealed that a large number of soliders in Germany's elite drill unit (Wachbataillon) have begun to grow breasts. Not a pair of boobs, but a single breast on the left side.

The condition is called gynecomastia (aka "man boobs" or "moobs"), which researchers have speculated is the result of the "mechanical impact of the carbine against the left side of the body during rifle drills," a collision that stimulates hormones that produce breast tissue.

Tough break for those soldiers who wear double-breasted coats but didn't sign up for the side effects. Gynecomastia occurs in a fairly high number of guys and it's a treatable condition, so take it up with your doctor if you've developed one or two moob(s).
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Panic! International Shortage Of Chicken Wings!

Posted 1/24/13 1:00 pm EST by in Food, News, Sports


Photo: Travel Channel

We figured farmers produced an unlimited supply of chicken wings or that our favorite appetizer grew on a Buffalo Wing Tree somewhere in the Midwest. Sadly, this is not the case, and it turns out, the National Chicken Council (for real) said that last summer's drought jacked up the price of corn, which made it more expensive to feed chicken. The point is, there are fewer dead birds and approximately 12.3 million fewer wings available for consumption for this year's Super Bowl.

That's a terrifying prospect for sure. A Super Bowl party sans wings is very breaking Guy Code. So what can you do about it? Well, for starters, leave NOW to buy a ton of wings at Costco, Sam's Club, your local grocery store or just steal them from mom's freezer. Or trespass at a local farm, tackle a chicken and "do it yourself" (although we're not condoning chicken larceny). Alternatively, call Hooters to check in on their wing supply. That said, nobody actually knows if Hooters serves wings. Just boobs. Don't forget the hot sauce, friends.

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