Photo: via TheBigLead
For many fans, the price of admission is an invitation to send a message -- to an opposing team, player, Oregon's cheerleaders, and so on. I'll wait a second for those of you weirdly attracted to blonde, Liza Minnelli-ish Eli Manning (you may have forgotten, Eli pulled a diva-move and refused to play for San Diego when he they drafted him, but the Chargers faithful clearly have not).
Just like we did last year, and the year before that, and the year before that, we've collected the greatest sports fan signs and listed them in no particular order. In this year's edition, we're very heavy on the #GameDaySigns submissions. These run the gamut from elaborate artistry to likening a conference to fecal matter. Not judging.
Photo: via TheBigLead
Photo: via GridironGrit
Photo: Scott Halleran//Getty Images
The Rockets' PR people are practically begging for Dwight Howard abuse with that smug shot they took (above) with the Photoshop-ready white page. Sure, we'll take the bait!
But before we get to our large offering of the best new names we could think of/find on the web, let's say goodbye to some of the best monikers that served us well last season: Ibaka Flocka Flame, Wake & Blake, Okurtober Fest, 50 Shades of Aaron Gray, Hold the Mayo, The Big Deng Theory, Hinrich Maneuver, Seed of Stuckey and Man Walks Into a Barea.
Happy drafting. Here we go!
1. Better Call Gasol
2. Dwight's Escape from L.A.
3. Houston, We Have a Drama
4. Don't Diop That Thun Thun Thun
5. Olynyk Clinic
6. Full Blown Wades
7. Bed Bath & Biyombo
8. Cloudy with a Chance of John Wall
9. Prokhorov's Cocktail
10. Kemba Walker, Texas Ranger
Photo: Toronto Star/Getty Images
It's been only nine months since the puck dropped for the
2012-2013 NHL season, but thankfully we're under three weeks from the start of a new, full regular season. Not bitter, Gary Bettman, just saying, because fantasy hockey players have to step up their games to sharpen some clever new team names.
Once again, out with the old: Fresh Prince of Brière, No Country for Old Beauchemin, Never Go Full Kopitard, Weekend at Bernier's, She Slobbered My Nabokov, Koekkoek For Cocoa Puffs, Don't Fehr the Reaper. And in with the new...
1. Subban'ed for Life
2. Epic Neal Time
3. What About Bobrovsky?
4. Nightmare On Helm Street
Photo: Getty Images
Former San Francisco 49ers running back Roger Craig rushed for 8,189 yards during his illustrious playing career -- and he hasn't stopped running since retiring in 1994. These days, he runs marathons, which made him uniquely suited to become the leading man for the NFL's new Back to Football Run Series -- a string of 12 5K races from late August through September at NFL stadiums throughout the league.
Guy Code caught up with Craig (figuratively -- the dude is still a burner) for a Q&A on running, modern NFL backfields, "Avatar" and Craig's ultimate realization that it's about damn time he meets Purple Jesus.
What's been your involvement with the NFL's Back to Football Run Series?
As a face of the NFL and someone who loves running. I've run in 23 full marathons and I host my own Rock and Roll Marathon. It's really cool – for myself, being a retired athlete -- to go out and run and encourage others.
Photos: Ronald C. Modra/Getty Images, Al Pereira/Getty Images
'Tis the season to be drafting your fantasy football team and, more importantly, coming up with funny or obnoxious or clever or offensive team names. Ideally some combination of all four. Offseason activities -- particularly those of Aaron Hernandez -- have given plenty of fodder to those looking for material for a good team name. Not judging.
Already Anthony Weiner's "Carlos Danger" alter-ego has already been beaten
off to death by fantasy players, so we won't bother dropping that moniker below. We've also steered away from derivations of Manning, Rodgers, Brees and other established players. Also, adios to: I'm a Man, I'm Forte!, It's On Like Ndamukong, Titus Young and the Restless, I Pitta the Fool, Forgetting Brandon Marshall and Gronk If You're Horny. Without further ado, we've once again curated the best fantasy names we could find on the Web for the just-about-here NFL season, and added in a bunch of our favorites.
The U.S. Open kicks off next weekend. The very same weekend that MTV airs the Mancation Weekend 2 marathon! Three days of guy-themed programming, featuring the premiere of "Jackass 3D."
There are only a handful of professional jackasses (above!) but plenty of amateurs who, for one reason or another, decide to become Tony Stewart behind the wheel of a golf cart. While the U.S. Open courses are too pristine for golf carts, it's high time for you, me and the four-wheeled, open-air, canopied idiot-mobile riders to dust off the clubs and hit the greens. A necessary word of caution: Don't be a jackass. But if you're born that way, check out the GIFs below, in which people went very, very wrong on a golf cart.
Photo via weknowmemes
Here's your other commencement speech, recent college graduate. It's going to be hard out there in the real world. Not "The Real World," but the rest of your loan-vexed, non-academic life, where the stakes are higher and your diploma really doesn't matter much anymore.
Two to three months after you strut across the stage in your graduation regalia, you'll get a letter from your college or university. In it, you will find a request for money. Not for more tuition -- for a donation, anywhere from $10 to $1,000. Does that sound like something you might be interested in?
Aaaaand it won't be long after graduation that you'll receive your first student loan bill. Remember those thousands of dollars you borrowed for tuition, books, housing, booze? Paying it all back is going to feel something like this:
Photo via reddit
Midway through Detroit starting pitcher Max Scherzer's third outing of the season, we noticed that the big hurler looks a bit like one of our favorite '90s cartoon characters: Doug Funnie from "Doug." (It has nothing to do with Scherzer's heterochromia, because Doug's eyes are merely black dots.)
He's not the only MLB pitcher with an animated lookalike. We think it's because MLB pitchers are a very diverse bunch with players of all shapes and sizes. There's fat guys, skinny guys, ugly guys and dorky guys. Check out the roster.
Joba Chamberlain -- P.J. Pete of "Goof Troop"
Photo: Getty Images
When Padres outfielder Carlos Quentin charged the mound last night, pitcher Zack Greinke (who'd just plunked him) sustained a fractured left collarbone in the bench-clearing brawl. This presents a virtual explosion of Guy Code topics: When does a player have grounds to charge the mound? For how long can a guy play the "hold me back!" routine before he ought to (1) stop that or (2) throw a fist?
Regardless, it didn't have to end this way. Greinke should've tackled Quentin's ass.
Let's examine the facts. Quentin has been hit by 42 pitches since 2011, leading all of Major League Baseball. Last night's HBP marks the third time Greinke hit Quentin, so they have a bit of a history, although Greinke claimed it was unintentional. Anyhow, Quentin took a step toward the mound, at which point Greinke might've said something, and then it was game on.
It looked like Grienke would use the Kyle Farnsworth two-legged takedown, until he just leaned in with his left shoulder and absorbed a big check from Quentin. It's understandable that the pitcher didn't want to break his throwing hand, but delivering a (likely collarbone-breaking) check made no sense! This isn't bumper cars!
Greinke had only a split-second to decide, but why not go for the tackle? In what other scenario would you body check a man charging at you!? We're not asking for a Nolan Ryan-style Robin Ventura head lock and beat down...just something more than a shoulder blow.
For that matter, Quentin started this thing and the best he had was a shove? Neither one of them threw a punch? We're not mad, just disappointed. Supposedly this was a brawl, yet hockey players they are not. Watch the video after the jump and judge for yourself.
Photos: Getty Images
Every time we fire up the Twitter machine and notice a celebrity's name is trending, we try to guess the reason. Most of the time the reason would make the person blush. Today, for example, Padres outfielder Carlos Quentin is trending 'cause he broke pitcher Zach Greinke's collarbone after getting hit by the ball. Not exactly why you want to become a trending topic.
This list covers pretty much every embarrassing scenario. Let's get to it.
1. Your sex tape leaked
Photo: Getty Images
The caveat is if you leaked it intentionally to launch a career (the Kardashian rule).
Recent examples: Hulk Hogan, Former Miss Teen Delaware