Today’s Dumbass: Man Tries To Pay Water Bill With Envelope Of Cocaine

Credit: Mark Renders/Getty Images

Who would have thought that the municipal Water Office would be so uptight?

The Water Office of Deltona, Florida, were evacuated when a man left after paying his water bill with an envelope that contained an unknown white powder. The evacuation proved to be unnecessary a few hours later once police determined that the powder was actually cocaine. The police are still searching for the suspect.

There’s a chance that this guy spent so much money on drugs that he actually didn’t have any cash left to pay his bills. But if you spend that much money on drugs, you’re probably not still trying to pay your bills. It might be more likely that this guy just grabbed the wrong envelope. That would mean that someone else became incredibly angry when they received a check for the Water Office instead of drugs.

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Neal Stastny (@NealStas) is a comedian and writer in New York.