5 Girls To Sleep With Before You Get Into A Relationship


Credit: Charley Gallay/Getty Images

It can happen at any time to any guy: You’re living a blissfully single life when, bam — you fall for a girl and find yourself smack in the middle of a committed relationship. Sooner or later, you’ll be holding in farts and sharing quinoa, so make sure you hook up with at least one of these chicks first.

D-List Celeb

Every guy should have at least one good “novelty sex” story in their back pocket, and D-list celebs are perfect for one-upping your buddy who hooked up with his professor or personal trainer. If you spot a reality “star” or has-been musician, buy her a drink and be her No. 1 (and maybe only) fan.

Total Psychopath

No one wants to date a chick who’s prone to tantrums and pathological lies, but the unfortunate reality is that these girls are generally incredible in bed. Have a tumble in the sheets with her, because everyone deserves that at least once in his life, but leave before she wakes up and stabs you  in the shoulder with a fork.

Foreigner

Much like the D-list celeb, hooking up with a girl abroad makes for a great story. Vacation sex is awesome because you can act even dumber and more recklessly than you usually do, and there are few things hotter than hearing your name called out in a thick accent.

Cougar

Respect your elders or, at the very least, get busy with one of them. Older chicks can teach you a lot about what women want and often have higher sex drives and lower inhibitions than their younger counterparts. Learn what you can from Mrs. Robinson before she seduces a more sophisticated suitor. Plus, she’ll probably pay for a couple dates.

Personal Trainer

Do we need to explain this one?

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Tess Barker (@TesstifyBarker) is a stand up comic with good taste in bad ideas.