How To Get Chicks Through Beer Pong

Beer Pong Chicks
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Beer pong is one of the greatest sports of all time — it makes any party more fun, and makes you as attractive to women as any other athlete. Just follow this helpful guide…

1. Find A Partner

Obviously, the first move to getting chicks through beer pong is to partner up with a babe. You’ll have to take initiative and ask her — this isn’t a Sadie Hawkins dance, it’s a beer pong game!

2. Talk Trash

Chicks dig confidence, and you know what screams confidence? Calling your shot like a real Babe Ruth of beer pong. I’ve gone as far as pretending to promise a sick child I’d win this next game for him, which gets a laugh from her, which is the goal of any drinking-related icebreaker.

3. Play Up The Camaraderie

Finish her beer for her? Of course. While you’re at it, give advice, talk strategy and otherwise act like a teammate. A common enemy is a real bonding experience, and chicks dig bonding.

4. Wash Her Balls

You heard me! Act like a real gentleman for once and wash her balls — plus you’ve just set yourself up for a sweet double entendre.

5. Place A Wager

“If I make this cup, you have to give me a kiss.” Hey, it worked for Happy Gilmore. If you miss the shot, she’ll still appreciate the charming attempt.

6. Win At All Costs

Guys on the other team might call you out for leaning over the table, but they’ll let it slide from a girl, so encourage her to cheat. I’ve even convinced chicks to flash their boobs simply to distract our opponents and help keep a game alive, giving new meaning to the “D” in defense.

You’d be surprised what she’ll do in the name of winning — which is good for you, ’cause the thrill of victory often leads to the thrill of hooking up.

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+ For more on drinking, watch “Ain’t That America With Lil Duval” tonight at 11:30/10:30c on MTV2

Sean Green is a standup comedian and podcast host living in LA.