Today’s Dumbass: Lineman Commits Robbery Wearing His Number

Korey Harris
Photo via

As we count down the days until the football season, we continue to increase the count of football players arrested. If you thought Aaron Hernandez did a poor job of planning his alleged crime, then meet 20-year-old Korey Harris, formerly a defensive end for the West Virginia Mountaineers, which kicked him off the team for allegedly breaking into a home and robbing two people at gunpoint.

How did the cops catch him? Cell phone records? DNA evidence? Jailhouse snitch? No, the victims told police they remembered Harris’s Mountaineers-issued sweatpants — with his number, 96, printed on them. Dude, why not just glue your license plate to your forehead?

Whether or not Harris has a future in the NFL, this case is a great argument for why we should pay college athletes.

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Sean Green is a stand-up comedian and podcast host living in LA.