On Wall Street, insider information is illegal ’cause it gives some guys an advantage over others. If you’re not watching “Girl Code,” you’re missing out on a similar advantage. Every week, we’re breaking down how you can use ladies’ secrets to up your game.
1. Be Careful About “Liking” Her Facebook Bikini Photos
Girls hate it when other girls overshare, but we’re with Andrew Schulz on this one: “Keep the Cancun pictures coming!”
However, you’ve gotta be subtle when expressing your appreciation, because she might not take it as flattery. Tanisha Long says, “If a guy ‘likes’ your picture at 2:45 in the morning on Facebook, he’s a creep…especially if it’s a picture from 2003. Then he’s a super creep.”
2. Be Perfect In Bed…And Imperfect Out Of It
A friend with benefits isn’t a friend for life–but she is a friend for your sex life. You get laid, and you don’t even have to worry about jealousy, meeting her parents or buying her dinner…so don’t ruin it by making her fall in love with you!
Shalyah Evans explains that an ideal FWB “is someone you think is super fun and physically attractive, but has no qualities you would ever want to be in a relationship with.” You don’t have to charm a girl; you just have to keep her coming back for more.
Like all good things, though, it can’t last forever. April Rose defines a FWB as “someone you don’t mind losing when the right guy comes along.” Until then, don’t be the right guy.
3. Never Ask Her If She Masturbates Thinking About You
“I’ve never pictured anyone I know,” says Alice Wetterlund. “When guys ask, ‘Do you think about me?’, I’m like, ‘No…especially not you.”
Oh, and if a girl masturbates after sex? It’s not because she’s feeling extra horny that night…it’s because you didn’t satisfy her. Step it up!
4. Know Her “Tell” When She Lies
“We lie about everything,” Melanie Iglesias says. “We lie about our age, our weight…” She even lies about being a bad liar!
The good news, as veteran poker players know, is that everyone has a giveaway. Jamie Lee listens for a girl’s voice going up a few octaves. Nicole Byer just keeps her eyes open: “White people change color when they lie.”
Jessimae Peluso‘s theory is that girls get away with lying because they’re cute and seem innocent, whereas guys are gross and seem untrustworthy. So clean yourself up. Wear a suit and tie. Get a nice job…maybe one on Wall Street, with access to all that sweet insider information. Who’d ever doubt your trustworthiness then?
+ Watch “Girl Code” Tuesdays at 10:30/9:30c on MTV