5 Ways Google Glass Will Up Your Game With The Ladies

Credit: Kevork Djansezian/Getty Images

Everybody’s geeking out over Google Glass, basically a computer you wear on your face and command with your voice. You know, like what the Terminator wears. Except instead of killing John Connor, you’re gonna kill it with the ladies. These glasses will be a household staple within a year or two, and will make your life awesome. Here’s five ways we’re sure they’ll up your game.

1. The Hidden Wingman

Turn on the camera when you approach a girl. Your friends can see what you see in real time to give you advice, encouragement and legit objections. Plus, you can look her up on Facebook, so you’ll know her favorite music, books and movies for conversation starters. (Just remember to turn that camera off if you wind up back at her place.)

2. Fashion Statement

Nerd girls love techie stuff. Sporting these glasses will give you a nerd pass. Show her how the glasses work and let her wear them. She might never give them back to you, but she’ll be eternally grateful.

3. Show Off

Not into nerd girls? The $1,500 price tag will impress just about anyone.

4. Zone Out Duds

If a girl is boring you to death on a date, it’s kinda rude to just start texting or tweeting on your phone. But with Google Glasses, you can surf the net (specifically, your online dating account) while pretending to listen.

5. Get More Foreign Girls

You can’t just fly to any random country and expect to get lucky, because you don’t speak the language… until now. If you turn on the translate function, the glasses will serve as your interpreter. It’s a small world after all.

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Charlie Kasov (@charliekasov) is a comedian and writer based in Brooklyn, New York.