10 Valentine’s Day Cards That Are Actually Funny

Valentine's Day Spirit Grips The U.S.
Credit: Jessica Rinaldi/Getty Images

You’ve bought the flowers (or stolen them off some grave) and the gift (or just made a cute “I’ll Admit You’re Right” coupon)… but you can’t forget the card. Because for some reason girls care about the card. The thing is, so many Valentine’s Day cards are corny as hell, and that’s not your style. You’re a hilarious dude, and Hallmark isn’t going to reflect that.

Don’t worry, we have you covered. Here’s the most romantic yet awesome cards of all time.

1. Beats A Teddy Bear

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2. In Sickness And In Health… But Mostly Sickness

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3. If Your Girlfriend Can’t Read

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4. For The Woman Who Values Honesty

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5. Creepy? Sweet? Both?

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6. Butt I Love You

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7. For The Woman With A Twisted Sense Of Humor

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8. Love Me Tender

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9. “Your” Perfect The Way You Are

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10. Make It A “Baywatch” Night

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Neal Stastny (@NealStas) is a comedian and writer in New York.