The 5 Most Absurd Celebrity Rivalries On Twitter

Photo via Know Your Meme

On Twitter, it’s troll or be trolled… and it’s no different for celebrities, who often beef with one another in 140 characters or less. Twitter allows stars to publicly air grievances, the same way a rapper would diss another rapper in his lyrics. But unlike a diss track, inflammatory tweets are immediate and get retweeted by legions of followers. Here are some of the most unlikely and brutal celebrity smackdowns in Twitter history.

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1. The Iron Sheik vs. Jose Canseco

Pro wrestlers love to tweet, even 72-year-old retired ones. Iranian legend of the squared circle The Iron Sheik is one of the most entertaining Twitter follows on any feed, largely due to his semi-constant, profanity-laced insults directed at a myriad of different celebs. The Sheik’s always blasting Chris Brown, Chris Bosh, O.J. Simpson and fellow wrestling superstars like Hulk Hogan and The Ultimate Warrior.

However, there’s one celebrity whom The Sheik seems to enjoy bashing the most: Jose Canseco. And Canseco gives it right back. So whether Sheikie baby (how he often refers to himself) is insulting the baseball great’s testicle size, Mexican heritage or dwindling bank account, a heated correspondence usually ensues.

2. CM Punk vs. Chris Brown

The “Straight Edge Superstar,” CM Punk, is another WWE wrestler who’s never shy about sharing his opinion. Following Chris Brown’s infamous incident with Rihanna, CM Punk tweeted that he’d like to “curb stomp that turd,” and retweets from his million-plus followers drew Brown’s attention. The controversial singer responded almost immediately. Punk shot back, but this time on YouTube:

Yes, this feud crossed platforms. If only Vince McMahon were able to book the match.

3. Chris Brown vs. Jenny Johnson

Speaking of Chris Brown, we’d be remiss not to mention his heated one-night battle with comedian Jenny Johnson. After she tweeted the above burn, Brown let forth a NSFW tirade that mentioned, among other things, that he wanted to poop in the comic’s eye. Johnson continued to mock Brown’s spelling and grammar, which only infuriated him more. When all was said and done, thousands of card-carrying #TeamBreezy members threatened Johnson’s life (with equally terrible grammar), and Brown temporary disabled his account. Just another day in the life of Chris Brown.

4. Bam Margera vs. Roger Ebert

Following the death of “Jackass” star Ryan Dunn, famed film critic Roger Ebert expressed his opinion on Twitter. Bam, who was grieving and angry, fired back. His fans (and Dunn’s fans) bombarded the 70-year-old cancer survivor with insults.

5. Ice-T vs. Aimee Mann

While Ice loves Coco, he sure as hell doesn’t love Aimee Mann. Back in 2010, without any provocation, the alt-rock singer slammed the rap legend (and “Law & Order: SVU” star). Ice responded with a unique culinary suggestion.

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Peter Hoare (@PeterHoare) is a screenwriter and dashingly handsome humorist.