I Ate The World’s Hottest Pepper [Video]

A bell pepper ranks a zero on the Scoville Scale, which measures hotness in capsaicinoids. Jalapeños range from 3,000-8,000 units. The former heavyweight pepper champion, the ghost chili, clocks in at a million units. The Trinidad Morgua Scorpion Pepper?

Two million units. And I ate it for my job.

See, I’m the “new guy” on the “Why Would You Eat That? Challenge!,” a web show where we feed crazy food to famous YouTubers. Crazy foods like, say, the world’s hottest pepper.

YOU: What does it taste like? 
ME: It tastes like giving the devil a blow job. His dick is on fire, and it goes all the way down your throat and into your intestines.

The worst part: It doesn’t stop. Hours later, I could still feel the pepper winding back and forth through my gastrointestinal tract. That’s 28 feet. And if you think it’s hot going in, just imagine what it feels like coming out. (Spoiler alert: terrible.) Watch me suffer in the video below.

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Ron Babock (@ronbabcock) is a standup comedian living in Los Angeles.