5 Reasons Why Gay Dudes Are The Best Wingmen

Credit: Dominik Bindl/Getty Images

All guys need a friend to be there for us, call us out on our mistakes and provide the necessary support when navigating through the rocky terrains of the opposite sex. (For more on this, check out Jon Gabrus in the trailer for “Wingman: The Movie.”) A solid wingman is necessary for heterosexual male success–but the more we think about it, our most solid wingmen are our gay friends. Here are five reasons why…

1. No Competition

When trying to impress a girl, the last thing you need is a complication like your friend saying, “Dude, I think I kinda like the one you’re talking to.” Your gay friend ensures you’re the lone wolf in the pack. It’s a straight path to success with little chance of interference.

2. You’ll Look Tolerant

In case you haven’t turned on the news or read a magazine lately, gay rights is a big issue. When a woman sees that you’re secure enough with yourself to have a gay best friend, and therefore not be a massive homophobe, then guess what? She’ll dig you even more, ’cause NEWSFLASH: women like a secure man.

3. The Ringing Endorsement

A wingman should make you seem like James Bond crossed with Jay-Z crossed with Mark Cuban, but most women have heard it all before. Sure, you make a ton of money and are “the funniest guy.” Zzzzzzzz.

However, your gay friends have the ability to talk you up to women in ways your straight friends cannot, because it would sound gay: By describing your kindness, your thoughtfulness and how amazing your abs are. (Gay dudes can spew bulls**t just like anyone.)

4. Cray-dar

A great wingman doesn’t just help you seal the deal; he protects you from crazy chicks. Unfortunately, a straight wingman can miss the red flags when he gets distracted by a girl’s hotness. Your gay friends have nothing to lose by letting you know how psychotically clingy and desperate she is. He’ll swat away the crazies and be sure your brain prevails over your penis.

5. The Best Advice

All of us strike out sometimes, crashing and burning so hard that we can see our dignity evaporate into thin air. Your straight friends will mock you–yucking it up to your pathetic failure–but your gay friends will actually explain what you did wrong and how to improve next time, because they know what’s attractive male behavior.

Trust your gay friends… they’re looking out for you. And maybe at you, but take it as a compliment.

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RG Daniels (@RGDaniels) is a comedian and writer in Brooklyn, NY.