A Guide to What’s Sick!, Siiiiick and Just Plain Sick

Credit: Kevin Winter/Getty Images

“Sick” is part of guys’ universal language. We use it in a number of different ways, but we all know what we’re talking about when we do.

There’s “Sick!” (directed at something cool, like a classy new purchase or an inventive new product that kicks so much ass, we must express admiration), “Siiiiick” (because we just laid witness to an extraordinary feat of strength, talent or athleticism; the more astonishing, the more “I”s), and “Sick…” (something gross; the word hangs in the air for a few seconds because we’re having trouble making sense of what we just saw).

To better illustrate the various uses, here’s a sick!/siiiick/sick… guide to sickness.

Examples Of “Sick!”

1. The Maserati Quattroporte

Credit: Maserati.com

A fine Italian luxury vehicle that’ll make your friends green with envy. Sleek and stylish, it commands respect on the road. You can put your tongue back in your mouth now.

2. The Kudoke KudOktopus Watch

Credit: Kudoke.eu

Kudoke is a German watchmaker known for exceptional craftsmanship and outstanding attention to detail. The KudOktopus features an eight-armed sea creature made entirely of roségold. Sick!

3. The Kohler Numi Toilet

Looking for a toilet that heats your ass/feet and automatically opens its lid? Look no further. Oh, there’s also remote control options to play your favorite music, illuminated panels so you don’t pee all over your feet at night, and auto flushing, so you’ll never forget again.

Examples Of “Siiiiiick”

1. JR Smith’s reverse alley-oop dunk

Prigioni’s feed to J.R. is perfect. The dunk? Downright nasty.

As for football, in no better situation do we find ourselves screaming “siiiiick” to the heavens (it’s the original “hallelujah”) than when a game-tying Hail Mary TD pass is successfully completed, assuming it’s not against our team.

2. DJ Fly on the gold turntables

DMC champion DJ Fly proves how to cut up the vinyl in this video. Turntablism tends to fly (so to speak) under the radar, but we guarantee this video will make you search for more.

3. Banksy’s and Edgar Mueller’s street art

Credit: Marco di Lauro/Getty Images

Street art shows off artists’ skills in ways we hadn’t seen in years. Danger can be involved, as is the case with Banksy, an anonymous British artist who scaled the West Bank wall in the Gaza Strip to nail the above piece. However, sometimes an artist like Edgar Mueller simply needs a sidewalk to throw down his mindblowing 3D art:

Credit: Getty Images

Examples Of “Sick…”

1. The Lizardman

Credit: Kevin Winter/Getty Images

We’re not exactly sure what motivated this guy to make himself look like a lizard–forked tongue and all–but if we ever saw him shopping at Target, we’d definitely say “sick…”

2. Jeff Goldblum as “The Fly”

Credit: 20th Century Fox

This picture does absolutely no justice to how gross “The Fly” really is. Trust us. Or don’t. Go watch it. (Or don’t.)

3. This video of a dude pouring egg nog through his nose

Look, we warned you over the holidays about this video. Just in case you didn’t believe us, here it is again. Not only is it “sick…”, it’ll make you sick too.

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RG Daniels (@RGDaniels) is a comedian and writer in Brooklyn, NY.