Instead of racking your brain with deep statistical analysis, why not make your fantasy picks based off their corresponding fantasy chicks?
Some of you might already be eliminated from the fantasy playoffs. While these picks won’t help you, looking at these fantasy chicks certainly will.
Johnny Manziel vs Collin Klein
While these guys aren’t technically fantasy football starters yet, it’s never too early to scout for your keeper league.
Collin Klein consistently put up big-time rushing and passing numbers this year, averaging 31.72 fantasy points per game. That’s not a surprise, although it’s shocking that he waited until his wedding day to kiss his wife, Shalin Klein, who’s an irresistible 9.6. Their total score: a chart-topping 41.32.
Johnny Manziel won the Heisman trophy… and the heart of his model girlfriend, Sarah Savage, whose 9.9–when added to his 38.74 fantasy average–brings them to a mind-boggling 48.64. (I don’t know whether Manziel has the size to succeed in the pros, but it’s never a great sign when your girlfriend’s shoulders are bigger than yours.)
Winner: Johnny Manziel
Russell Wilson vs Ben Roethlisberger
With a 17.28 fantasy average, Russell Wilson is doing all he can to squeeze his name into Rookie Of The Year considerations. His wife Ashton is a seasoned veteran when it comes to looking smoking hot, earning a 9.2 on the babe scale for a total score of 26.48.
The injury-plagued Ben Roethlisberger has amassed an amazing 21.58 fantasy points per game for the Steelers. Since he didn’t live with his fiancee Ashley prior to their marriage for religious reasons, it’d be blasphemy to score her any lower than 9.6, for a fantasy couple total of 31.08.
Winner: Ben Roethlisberger
If you need help deciding your fantasy football match-ups, tweet @greenroomshow early in the week and I’ll include them in this week’s column.