Diehard Degenerate: Sports Gambling NFL Week 14

Andrew Luck
Credit: Leon Halip/Getty Images

Sean Green hosts the Sports Gambling Podcast and is our expert on losing money.

Do you believe in miracles??? That’s what I yelled at my TV as Damaris Johnson took a punt 98 yards back with only 51 seconds left on the clock for a “meaningless” touchdown, ensuring a dramatic 10.5-point cover for the Eagles in one of the most exciting gambling moments of the season. While I’m disappointed as a fan that the Eagles’ season is over, every team can be your team when you’ve got money on the game.

Cincinnati Bengals -3 vs Dallas Cowboys

Cincinnati has won and covered in their last four games. Meanwhile, Dallas is a measly 1-5 against the spread in their last six. For the Cowboys, the big D stands for “dysfunction.” Without a strong leader or coach, they’ll struggle against the Bengals, who are hungrier than Roy’s tiger at the Mirage. Give me Cincinnati laying three.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers -7 vs Philadelphia Eagles

These two teams are polar opposites: Philly a dismal 2-9-1 against the line, and Tampa an amazing 9-2-1. Philly raised the white flag weeks ago–the turnover battle has been a lost cause for this team–and the Bucs will plunder whatever dignity the Eagles have left, sending a final salvo into the sinking Andy Reid ship.

Indianapolis Colts -5 vs Tennessee Titans

Last week the Colts continued their epic run, going 6-1 ATS while winning in dramatic fashion. That Stanford architecture degree is paying dividends for Luck, who’s rebuilding a franchise from the ground up. (He’s also minimizing the chance of a beat-down from my bookie.) Add in the fact that the Colts are playing for their sick coach, and you basically have a Hollywood script… except in this movie, the underdog gets the crap smashed out of them.

Prosperous Prop Bets

Shonn Greene Rushing Yards 75.5: Over -110

With a continued QB controversy in New York, one thing is for certain: Shonn Greene will get some carries. Plus, as a guy named Sean Green, it’s a real thrill watching a fellow Shonn Greene succeed in the NFL.

Drew Brees Total Completions 25.5 : Over -110

Throwing five interceptions, Drew Brees has to be more embarrassed than the time Oprah mistook his birthmark for lipstick. He’s a real pro, though, and will rebound against a suspect Giants secondary.

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Sean Green (@greenroomshow) is a standup comedian and podcast host living in Los Angeles