The 5 Hottest Teachers Fired For Being Too Sexy
Chris Distefano & Carly Aquilino Explain How They Started Dating, Kinda
The 10 Best Slang Terms For Female 'Alone Time'
For World AIDS Day, a Chinese sex toy company sponsored the First China Masturbation Competition. (Because you can't get AIDS from jerking off, or something?) Seven guys hid their identities with masks--and hid their junk with orange buckets--before attempting to outlast each other. Attractive ladies held a blowup doll to make it (and them) harder.
Needless to say, this breaks Guy Code in too many ways to count. Unless you actually enjoy whacking it with a half-dozen other dudes, in which case we won't judge you. (Much.) Everyone has a few kinks, right?
But if you just want to win a contest, then you've crossed a line, especially since the victor doesn't appear to win a prize. A "1st Place" ribbon is no incentive to debase yourself for a dildo manufacturer's bizarre publicity stunt.
Even if it's for charity like the San Francisco Masturbate-A-Thon--which has raised $25,000 for safe sex education and other causes--you're still not in the clear. Because you could just donate the cash without pleasuring yourself in the company of strangers.
The only possible way to uphold Guy Code at a masturbation contest? By setting a new world record, like porn star Sonny Nash did at 2012's San Francisco competition. His 10-hour, 10-minute jack session is a true athletic achievement. But if you don't have that kind of stamina in you, do yourself a favor and keep it in your pants.
NSFW video from China below, if you want to feel disgusted and/or weirdly intrigued:
