Today’s Dumbass: Chef Hospitalized Due To His Own Hot Sauce

Credit: Monika Graff/Getty Images

If you challenge others to withstand your hot wings, you should be able to handle them yourself. But London chef Arif Ali expected diners to bite off more than he could chew.

Intended as a test of manliness for adventurous clientele, the sauce was derived from Naga Jolokia chilis, which Guinness World Records previously recognized as the hottest on earth. (Oh, and they’re supposed to be handled with latex gloves.) The pepper is used for keeping elephants at bay, and Indian military scientists have even weaponized it.

After chomping a wing, Ali tried to calm the horrific burning with milk, but to no avail. And then, for some reason, he ate two more. He sweated, gasped, lost consciousness and wound up in the Emergency Room. The hot sauce didn’t kill him, but he probably wished it had, since he spent most of the next week on the toilet, s***ting his friggin’ brains out.

The restaurant’s manager told reporters, “We have now decided in the interests of customer safety not to put this particular item on our menu.” What a sissy.

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Marty Beckerman (@martybeckerman) is the Associate Editor of Guy Code Blog