6 Things That Are Great Being Single

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The cast of “Guy Code” discusses being single on tomorrow night’s show, but we’re starting the conversation early. Your lady is gone. Maybe she finally had enough of you paying more attention to your XBox instead of her? The bad news is you’re back in the game as a rookie and have to work your way off the bench. The good news? Being single ain’t such a bad thing. Sure, it gets a bad rep as you constantly prove yourself to be the independent, successful champion you claim to be, but take a look at who and what else is single and you’ll see it in a positive light.

Women’s Singles Tennis

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Serena, Maria, Victoria–yes, please. It’s been interesting to watch the rise of women’s tennis since the Williams sisters began dominating the courts. We’ve seen an army of gorgeous Europeans storm into our living rooms, not to mention the Williams redefine the style of a female athlete. Oh…and the grunting. We can never get enough of that.

Single Malt Scotch

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A quick reminder: Single malt scotch means the barley (a.k.a. the malted grain) was distilled in one place (hence, “single”). Another reminder: Single malt scotch is delicious. One more reminder: We need a refill. The next reminder: After the third glass we are no longer seeing single. One final reminder: Single malt scotch is delicious. (Did we already say that? Somebody give us a ride home…)

Music Singles

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Everybody knows when the single drops, the album is sure to follow. That’s why we get amped about music singles. It’s the perfect dose of music until the release date. And let’s be honest, most of the time the single is the only thing worth cranking in your car with the bass turned up. When we’re told about the single we begin circling it like bears on campers in the woods.

Kraft Singles cheese slices

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Does anything bring you back to the days of being a snotty-nosed five-year-old like plastic-wrapped cheese? We came home from school, tossed ourselves in front of the TV and sank our plaque-ridden teeth into these neon orange squares of joy. Maybe cheese shouldn’t be that shiny, but damn they are delicious!

The movie “Singles”

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Cameron Crowe‘s flick about daters in early-’90s Seattle was a snapshot of an era. Grunge and hip-hop were rising to the top. Before smelly hipsters wore plaid, smelly rockers wore it. And once everyone stopped laughing at MC Hammer, real hip-hop began taking over the charts. If there’s any reason to sit through the movie, though, it’s the cameo from Sonics swingman Xavier McDaniel during a sex scene. Yeah, you read that right.

Hugh Hefner

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Here’s a guy that prides himself on being single. At 86-years-old, all he’s ever done is advance the sexual revolution while bedding countless models in a mansion that rock stars beg to hang out in. Livin’ the dream, Hef!

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RG Daniels (@RGDaniels) is a comedian in Brooklyn, NY.