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Ugh, musicians. Not the manliest group of guys as a whole. They used be all about sex, drugs and rock ‘n’ roll. Now you might find those same guys spending two seasons judging “American Idol.” However, don’t fret, there are some musicians who still carry the badass torch and follow Guy Code. In fact, we found five who were nominated in tonight’s 2012 Video Music Awards (8/7c) on MTV.
1. Imagine Dragons
Though the name “Imagine Dragons” definitely causes this VMA-nominated band for Best Rock Video to lose some points on the guy scale, here’s a fact that doesn’t: they recorded their debut album in a Las Vegas casino. A casino! Gambling, booze, hookers–now that’s a guy-friendly work environment, am I right?
2. Jack White
Nothing says “guy” like being able to shred on a guitar. Ever noticed how a low slung electric guitar looks like a giant dick? Of course you have. And Jack White knows how to work his dick (proverbially, of course. Maybe literally too. I don’t know). Rolling Stone named him one of the 100 Greatest Guitarists of All Time. Oh yeah, and he dates actresses and marries models and pretty much just does whatever the hell he wants. Rock on.
A lot of rappers like to talk about how they had a tough time growing up. Maybe it was a rough family life. Maybe they lived in a bad neighborhood. And sometimes you wonder if maybe they’re stretching the truth just a bit, attempting to get some extra street cred. But not with K’Naan (nominated for Best Video With A Message). K’Naan grew up in Mogadishu. Yeah, in Somaila. During the Somali Civil War. Now that is a bad neighborhood. Real talk.
4. Duck Sauce
Sure, dance music is a not-so-guy-friendly musical genre, but you gotta give Duck Sauce credit for trying to turn things around. First, they had a song called “Barbra Streisand” that’s actually good. Then, this year they score a VMA nomination for Best Electronic Dance Music Video with the song “Big Bad Wolf” featuring dudes (and, spoiler alert, a lady) with heads for penises. Most guys will admit their penises do most of their thinking, which makes me surprised no one’s penis thought of this genius video idea before.
Finally, staying in the dance rock category, I just wanted to make sure everyone knows that Skrillex is dating UK singer Ellie Goulding. That’s a pretty good score for a guy with Skrillex hair. Seriously, I was up in the air about Skrillex, but I gotta give him credit for pulling an international pop star. High five, dude. You made the Guy Code list. That’s gotta be, like, your all-time biggest honor ever. You’re welcome.