5 Songs For Sweaty Summer Sex

Credit: CP Photo Art

We know you and your girlfriend are getting ready to watch the Olympics. Both of you will be ogling some scantily-clad athletes and feeling a bit randy. No doubt it’s hot as hell in your house, and things are going to get stinky. You need the right soundtrack to keep you in the bone zone. We’ve compiled some songs to get you started.

Katy B. “On A Mission”

If you can get down to this rhythm, you don’t need any advice from us.

Maroon 5 Featuring Wiz Khalifa – “Payphone”

Learning the art of tantra–delaying gratification–is difficult. Adam Levine‘s auto-tuned altar boy twang should help. As for staying in the mood, the trick is to not close your eyes, pump your fist and mouth the words to Wiz Khalifa‘s verse.

Rihanna – “Where Have You Been”

Obviously this song was written for having sex. Or so you can look out the window of a fast-moving train and reflect on your life properly. There’s something to arouse everyone in this song: the shout-out to Johnny Cash (“I’ve been everywhere man”), the “Mortal Kombat” organ riff, the eerie euro-trash techno breakdown in the middle, Rihanna herself …

Foster the People – “Houdini”

It’s Thursday night. Your A/C is broken. You’ve just watched reruns of “The Office,” “Community,” “30 Rock” … and you need some everything-is-OK, sweet-hipster music for getting buzy. FTP have you covered.

Steve Aoki With Travis Barker & Kid Cudi – “Cudi the Kid”

Contrary to popular opinion, dubstep is enjoyable for more than just robbing banks in slow motion and watching people you hate have heart attacks. Bump this Aoki track and get busy like a mad British raver. Strobe light optional.
One last thing…for all that is good and pure in the world, do not watch the video for this song while gettin’ it on. We won’t go into it except to say that it involves clowns, children and nuns.

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